Picture this: You're texting with someone new and the conversation is flowing. Your fingers are dancing across that little keyboard like you're some chatty Mozart. You really like this person, and they seem to be picking up on the energy you’re putting down. But then, it happens: the dreaded text lull. The conversation fizzles out and you’re wondering what just happened. Now, you’re desperate for questions to ask your crush that’ll keep your flirty banter going.
First off, don’t panic. It’s totally normal for conversations to fizzle out, especially when you’re still getting to know your crush. If you don’t have a lot of friends in common or have totally different interests, finding equal ground can be tricky. Your crush could also just have other things going on at the moment that may make it hard for them to give your conversation their undivided attention. “People might be tired, they might be distracted, there could be a lot of explanations that have nothing to do with you and the actual conversation,” Ali Mattu, Ph.D., assistant professor at the Columbia University Medical Center, told Refinery29. “When we’re in a conversation and it might be dying out, we can take it so personally, and take so much responsibility for it, but in reality, it might not have anything to do with the conversation itself.”
TLDR: Try not to stress. Here are 21 conversation-reviving questions to ask your crush next time you sense the momentum fizzling out.
Keep Your Questions Light
If you and your crush are just starting to get to know each other, try keeping your conversation light and breezy. Consider asking open-ended questions that are actually fun for the recipient to think about and answer. (Bonus points for making them laugh.) Below, some questions to help you keep it casual.
- If you had to choose, would you rather travel the world or build your dream house?
- Would you (or have you) ever gone to a topless/clothing-optional beach?
- If you could trade lives with any celebrity, who would it be?
- What's your weirdest deal-breaker?
- What’s something you find attractive that most people would consider strange?
- What is the best present anyone has ever given you?
- If you were suddenly invisible for the day, how would you spend it?
- What's something everyone else loves that you think is totally overrated?
- What's something everyone else hates that you love?
- Do you have a nemesis? If so, who are they?
- If you could travel through time, would you explore the past or see the future?
- What would you do if I told you how hot you are?
Take Your Questions To The Next Level
Because texting your crush is more low-key than hanging out IRL, you may feel more comfortable opening up in a way that’s harder face-to-face. Once you’ve gotten through some small chit-chat, consider asking more profound questions to really learn more about your crush. (And to find out if they’re even crush-worthy at all!) Here are some questions to help you dig a little deeper.
- Would you rather have unlimited love, or unlimited money?
- Be honest, what do you think is your worst habit?
- If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?
- What's the thing you would be most disappointed about never having gotten to experience?
- What’s your weirdest pet peeve?
- What’s the best advice anyone has ever given you?
- What's the scariest thing that has ever happened to you?
- What's the worst thing you have ever lied about, and did you get away with it?
- What's something you are terrified to try, but you want to anyway?
Remember: All conversations, even digital ones, have a natural ebb and flow. So sometimes the best thing you can say is nothing at all. If you were the last one to text, kick back, relax, and give them some time to reply before firing off more questions. All of the above are great for when you sense that the convo just needs a bit of a kickstart, but don’t be afraid to wait a bit until something comes up that would be a natural reason to reinitiate conversation.
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