7 2019 New Year's Resolutions For Dating Apps To Help You Get Exactly What You Want
2018 is almost canceled which means it's time to look ahead to the new year and sort out your #goals for the next 365 days. If you've been feeling discouraged about the world of dating and want to step up your game next year, it might be a good idea to set some 2019 New Year's resolutions for dating apps.
Cuffing season ends in March, but you've got a whole year ahead of you to take the reigns on your dating life. Maybe you want a bae to call your own, or maybe you're just looking for a breezy fling or your next hookup. Dating apps can sync you up with all kinds of amazing people as long as you know how to look for them. You can set goals and resolve to better yourself any day of the year, of course, but January 1 is the perfect opportunity to take a dive with online dating.
Have you been feeling a little salty about how your dating life has gone over the past year? Consider these seven New Year's resolutions to help you get what you want in the coming year. These resolutions go in order, so consider this your 2019 dating app cheat sheet.
1. Perfect Your Profile
OK, first things first: If you want to hit the refresh button on dating apps in 2019, you've gotta start with your profile. Upload the max amount of pictures allowed, and if it's not obvious, set a stellar one as your feature photo. If you could stand for an updated headshot, take a new one. There's nothing wrong with selfies, but you might consider having someone take a picture of you with the Portrait Mode feature on an iPhone X — it's a super easy way to get professional-looking photos. If someone can't tell what you look like from your pictures, they might assume you're trying to hide something. You want to appear friendly, fun, and approachable, so I recommend a big smile for your feature photo.
Now, for the text portion of your dating app profile. Be sure to include enough information that would spark someone's interest and make them want to know more about you. It doesn't have to be super personal, but if you have a favorite type of food, band, or sports team you follow, include that, because it will help you match with people who have the same interests. You don't need to be extra, but it's totally OK to humble-brag.
2. Swipe Right On People You Usually Swipe Left On
When it comes to dating apps, your initial impression of someone is based on their photos, so it's easy to be dismissive. If swiping left has become an instinct for you, you may want to try swiping right on people you would normally pass on. A lot of solid long-term relationships begin when one or both parties are a little iffy about going out with the other person. You really never know what someone will be like (or look like) until you meet them in person, so try to have an open mind here.
3. Know Your Real Deal Breakers
Although I recommend expanding your horizons and swiping right on people you might typically swipe left on, it's also good to know what your real deal breakers are. If you absolutely know it wouldn't work out with someone who has certain qualities or lives a particular lifestyle, there's no reason why you should feel like you need to go out with them.
Maybe you can only picture yourself with somebody as woke as you, maybe you only want to date someone with a similar work schedule, or perhaps you know it would never work out with someone who doesn't like to dance. Deal breakers are completely personal, and only you can decide what would or wouldn't be acceptable for you. Remember that you're in charge here, and you're not a snob for having standards — whatever those standards may be.
4. Revise Your Opening Line
I don't know about you, but when I was using dating apps, the people who messaged me with a simple "Hi" or "What's up" did not stand out or make me rush to engage with them. Think about revising your go-to opening line and messaging your matches with something a little more creative. There's no shame in using the same opening line with different people, but you might also want to personalize each one. What stood out to you about this person's profile? Let them know. Do they love a certain movie you're equally as obsessed with? Send them your favorite quote. Is humor your strong suit? Say something goofy.
Not only should you revise your opening line, but you should also use an opening line. We're heading into 2019, and there's no reason why you shouldn't be the one to initiate conversations with people you're interested in.
5. Turn Your Notifications Off
So, now you've got your profile on point, you've been swiping right on a few more people, and you've even reached out to a couple of hotties. This may sound counterintuitive, but now's the time to turn your notifications off!
Why? Dating apps are a great tool for meeting people, but they aren't your whole life. Check in a few times a day to see what's up, but don't obsess over it. Turning off your notifications will prevent you from getting burnt out and allow you to approach dating apps with confidence and control.
6. Go On 15 First Dates Before Summer
The thing about dating apps is that although they offer a way to digitally connect, you're supposed to meet up with people IRL, too. Make it a 2019 goal to go on 15 first dates before summertime. It doesn't have to be 15 dates — it could be five, 10, or 20. The point is to go on more first dates than you've been going on. It might seem like a lot, but try not to feel too overwhelmed. The only way to be successful with dating apps is to meet people you really connect with — and that means in the flesh!
FOMO is real, and it can be prevented by actually getting out there — and not just to Netflix and chill. If you go on a few bad first dates, don't let it deter you. Just because you didn't click with someone, that doesn't mean you won't click with anyone. Also, an unsatisfactory first date doesn't necessarily mean that person is wrong for you. And if you find what you're looking for before you reach 15 dates, you're off the hook!
7. Know Your Worth
IMO, the most important thing you can do to be successful and find what you want on dating apps is to know your worth. When you meet someone new, try to be clear and honest about what you're looking for. You don't need to downplay what you truly want or mold to what you think someone else is looking for. If you don't want the same things, or if someone doesn't message you back, no sweat!
Unfortunately, ghosting is just a part of dating apps, so don't get too shook if it happens to you. The best part about dating apps is that there are a virtually endless amount of people on them, so dust yourself off, and get back to the drawing board.
Most importantly, be yourself. Once you get past the highlight reel phase of a relationship, your authentic self is what you'll really be offering someone.