Halloween is stressful. Choosing the right costume is the hardest decision that you'll make all year.
It's already mid-October, and I can confidently assume that the majority of you have no idea what you're going to be yet.
I'm not one to judge, though, because I don't know what I'm going to be either. We're all in this together, my friends, but the clock is ticking.
To make the correct costume decision, you must assess every relevant asset of the year, and think to yourself, "How can I make this look slutty?"
Don't be ashamed if you agree.
Take it from Cady Heron, a wise foreign exchange student from Africa who once said,
In girl world, Halloween is the one day a year when a girl can dress up like a total slut and no other girls can say anything else about it.
But, if you'd rather be scary than slutty (or if you're a dude), you've got plenty of options.
You definitely won't have trouble finding a terrifying costume that reflects 2016 because just about everything about this year has been scary AF. (i.e. clown sightings, the presidential election, etc.)
If you're still debating on which route to take at this point, I've got your back.
In fact, I turned to the stars with hopes that they'd help me answer all of your Halloween costume questions — and luckily, they did.
Thanks to your zodiac sign (and me), you're going to win the prize for best dressed at every single party you attend this Halloween.
Let's do this.
Aquarius: Ken Bone
If you're an Aquarius, you're smart AF, so be proud. You're also a deep thinker, and you're stimulated by the conversation of others. But, you've got some major trust issues and constantly strive for independence.
Amongst the craziness of this presidential election, what better costume to rock than the sexy Ken Bone?
Guys, you can pull this off, too.
a guy in my dorm is dressing as ken bone for halloween and i've never loved a halloween costume so much @kenbone18 pic.twitter.com/xp5dsagTpd — Hannah Liddle (@han_liddle) October 17, 2016
Pisces: Bernie Sanders
Pisces are known to be selfless and to possess a passion for helping others. You're a friendly music-lover with a ton of wisdom, aka Bernie Sanders.
Although he's no longer in the race to be the next president, you can still feel the Bern on October 31.
See the resemblance?
Aries: A member of the Kardashian Family
Aries are risk takers. They're super confident, determined and passionate about their endeavors. Competition comes naturally to them, just like everyone in the Kardashian family.
This Halloween, choose your favorite guy or gal from the star-studded fam and rock their style. But please, steer clear of the Kim K robbery costume — it's just not cool.
Try for a wholesome Kylie Jenner look, instead.
Taurus: Donald Trump
If you're a Taurus, the stars are telling me that you'd make a great Donald Trump for Halloween. But before you freak out, let's focus on the positive assets that you can relate to The Donald with.
Apparently, you've got a powerful demeanor, and are partial to materialistic items (aka, you really like pretty things). You're also known to be conservative and are pretty damn good at making money.
Dudes, a Donald costume would be simple for you if you'd like to give it a try. You might need some orange paint, though.
Gemini: An emoji
Geminis have great communication skills and are pros at exchanging ideas. They're expressive and love to be social, so what better costume to rock this year than your favorite emoji?
With all of the new emojis that were released in 2016, your options are endless — so pick a good one!
They're universal, too, so don't be afraid to try 'em out, boys.
Cancer: Eleven from "Stranger Things"
You're sensitive, moody and a little suspicious, Cancer — just like Eleven from "Stranger Things". You're a homebody and often feel strong emotions that may sometimes seem uncontrollable and are seemingly mysterious.
Go buy some Eggos, and start preparing.
Leos are leaders. They're known to be dominant and confident, just like Harambe. This Halloween, pay respect to the gorilla that we've loved and mourned. Believe me, you'll be the king (or queen) of every party you attend and gain a ton of respect.
Guys, go grab a gorilla suit and represent.
Virgo: Hillary Clinton
Similar to our Democratic nominee, Virgos exhibit a hardworking personality, and are extremely practical and great speakers. They're known to be methodical and are very careful in the choices that they make.
If you're a Virgo, be Hillary. And don't forget to shimmy down at every party you attend this Halloweekend.
Libra: A Pokémon of your choice
One of the most prominent traits of a Libra is that they love to be around people. They value partnership and enjoy being social — especially outdoors.
With that being said, a Pokémon would be the perfect choice for a Libra costume. We were all witness to the Pokémon Go craze this year, and any Libra who enjoys communicating with others and getting fresh air would thrive in a Pokémon costume of their choice.
Scorpio: Harley Quinn
If you're a Scorpio (like me, hehe), Harley Quinn is the perfect Halloween costume for you.
You're passionate, assertive, sexual and pretty badass, just like the Joker's girlfriend. You've got a bubbly personality, but in reality, you're a bit controlling and have your goals set straight.
Be Harley Quinn, and if you're a dude, you can still be Harley Quinn! Or, you can be The Joker — whichever you prefer.
Sagittarius: Your favorite Snapchat filter
If you're a Sagittarius, you're admired for your sense of humor and passion for constant change. What better Halloween costume to be than a Snapchat filter?
The app is constantly swapping in and out new looks, and most of them are funny AF. Plus, your options are endless. Whether you're a virtual puppy or a big-eyed rainbow-spitter, your friends will get a kick out of your costume.
Capricorn: Khaleesi from "Game of Thrones"
Capricorns are valued for their ambition and determination, so what better costume to choose this year than Khaleesi from "Game of Thrones"? I mean, if growing your own army doesn't scream "ambition," then I don't know what does.
So there you have it, everyone.
Hopefully, I've helped you on your journey through the zodiac to find your Halloween costume.
Whenever you're in doubt, just look to the stars — they'll always show you the way.
And when all else fails, be a banana.