“Dirty, in a sexy way.”
If you're a big Cardi B fan, you may have noticed a recurring trend in her lyrics. From lines like, "eat this *ss like soufflé" to "Bae, it's a snack,' he said, 'It's an entrée,'" Cardi likes to rap about the behind-the-scenes of, well, her literal behind. Whether you've just heard about eating the booty or you're curious about trying out some ass licking IRL, it's natural to wonder: What does rimming feel like?
There’s a reason people (Sex and the City’s Charlotte York included) like to indulge in a little bit of ass play. “There are so many nerve endings around the sphincter, so there’s a lot that we can do to play with that area,” Lola Jean, sex educator and mental health professional, tells Elite Daily. If this is your first time trying some butt play, Jean suggests rimming as a sexual “side dish,” so to speak. “Especially if we’re new to this, we’re probably already familiar with genital stimulation, so we know what that feels like — we’ve done it before, we’re familiar with it. It can be nice to start with something familiar, and then add a little bit of unfamiliar.”
As Jean notes, rimming isn’t for everyone. “Really, you have to have trust and [have] comfort in your partner and your butt,” she says. If you’re feeling worried or uncomfortable, you’re not going to be relaxed — and your sphincter won’t be, either. But if you are curious, you aren’t alone, and as long as what you're doing is consensual and pleasurable to you and your partner(s), there's no wrong or right way to get to it.
Here, 12 people open up about what rimming really feels like — and why they are (or aren’t!) into it.
My girlfriend and I would joke about it a lot just because we heard people talk about it all the time. One time I was going down on her and I kind of wanted to try it, so I asked if it would be OK and she said yes and she really loved it. It took me a while to get comfortable with her doing it to me, but she did it the other day and it just felt really good. It felt new and exciting and kind of dirty, in a sexy way.
— Marie, 24
[My] new partner was so open and responsive to everything we tried sexually that I really wanted to try it — not for its own sake as a kink, but as another possible way to cause pleasure. The trust and vulnerability of letting me do it coupled with seeing him enjoy it turns me on so much.
— u/irishtrashpanda on Reddit
Feels really amazing (physically and mentally), especially when he moans occasionally when doing it as I can feel the vibration. It's even better after a hard spanking and he's softly kissing all of the skin that's red.
— u/99celsius on Reddit
I'm super sensitive down there, so it feels so good when someone licks or breathes on it. It's just really enjoyable and feels nice.
— Becca, 21
This guy I used to sleep with in college was just into butt stuff. Like, I would peg him, and he loved getting his butt eaten and he would do it to me from behind — like, as I was on all fours. It just made me feel large and in charge.
— Monica, 24
Sex obviously needs to be consensual, but recently I was, like, in my boyfriend's bed and he started doing it and I was like, ‘Wow.’ Like, it’s just hot when it’s unexpected.
— Cassidy, 23
I enjoy it myself, but really only in conjunction with fingering. It feels good, don't get me wrong, but on its own, it's a little lackluster, unless it’s the lead up for full-on anal penetration.
— u/MandyMonroe2012 on Reddit
I really enjoy being rimmed while in the doggy style position — just makes it easier for everyone involved. Overall, I actually like it better than oral sex. It’s much more sensitive and it just feels really good. My one tip: Let go. It’s going to be difficult, but just relax and let them do their thing.
— u/Chladaigh on Reddit
I like it, but I'm pretty particular about it. I only like it right after I've showered or during a shower. Once his mouth goes there it isn't going anyplace else, like my mouth or my vagina. Same with fingers — just no.
— u/throwaway10849 on Reddit
Sensitivity will differ with everybody, yes. Personally, just touching my ass hole doesn’t do much. If my clit is being stimulated, then ass hole stimulation done right feels amazing. Try it on yourself with a wet finger while masturbating.
— u/sunbuns on Reddit
It tickled, but not in an “Ooh, sexy!” kind of way. Just a “F*ck, that's annoying. Stop it!” kind of way.
— u/peppermind on Reddit
I love giving and receiving! I do have to be comfortable and feel clean, so it's not something I like for spontaneous sex where I haven't had a chance to clean up. But if I'm prepared and I can relax, it feels amazing.
— u/pugaholic on Reddit
From anilingus to rimming to (as the kids say) eating the booty, there are tons of names for going down on the derrière. If someone literally kissing your butt seems appealing to you, consider talking to your partner about your sexual preferences and fantasies. Talking openly and honestly about your sexual desires is a great way to educate others about sex and de-stigmatize sexual preferences, and as long as everyone is on the same page, there's no wrong or right way to have sex — no ifs, ands, or butts about that.
Experts:
Lola Jean, sex educator, instructor, and coach
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