If you're looking for love in quarantine, virtual dating is the safest strategy. But even though FaceTime and Zoom are useful, meeting someone online is just as nerve-wracking as meeting them IRL. What if it's awkward? What if you don't like them? What if you have something stuck in your teeth and you don't notice until you're face-to-face with the frontward-facing camera?! Take a breath, and don't panic. There are several ways to feel sexy on a FaceTime date and ensure your bad b*tch energy oozes through the screen.
A wonderful way to harness this energy is to pamper yourself before your date. "If you want to feel great for a date, spend the day making sure that you prioritize your self-care," confidence coach Trish Blackwell previously told Elite Daily. And don't be afraid to gas yourself up, whatever that looks like for you. "It's OK to be nervous. Translate your nerves as excitement, and you'll give yourself a confidence advantage," Blackwell added.
Here are seven concrete ways to feel self-assured and sexy before a FaceTime date. (And they're all free and fun.) Just remember: Your date is so lucky to be talking to you tonight, and they're probably just as nervous as you are.
Whether you go for a jog or run through your favorite TikTok dances, moving your body can do wonders for your self-esteem. "Doctors and mental health professionals alike sing the praises of exercise and mental health," sexuality educator Janielle Bryan tells Elite Daily. "Moving your body in whatever way that’s healthy for you can help you connect with your body and change [your] brain chemistry."
"That could be running, stretching, yoga, or twerking in the mirror," she adds. When you get moving, you'll be distracted from worrying about your upcoming date. Plus, your twerk session or stroll through the park can also release endorphins, aka, feel-good hormones.
It can be hard to feel sexy when you're stuck at home in sweats all day. One way you can flip the script? Strip down. "Research suggests that nudists report greater life satisfaction, higher self-esteem, and more positive body image," Dr. Jess O' Reilly, Astroglide’s resident sexologist, previously told Elite Daily. "Real-life nudity — and not just what we see on television or the internet — may help us appreciate the diversity of human beauty."
Don't be afraid to take your clothes off, masturbate, take a luxurious bubble bath, and appreciate everything your body does for you on the daily.
If you want to take nudity a step further, take some pictures. You don't even have to send them to anyone — take photos for yourself. "[Nudes] help promote body positivity and are a way to celebrate your sexuality," Dr. Shannon Chavez, resident sex therapist for K-Y, previously told Elite Daily. "Alleviate the pressure to make the photos perfect. Have fun and don’t be afraid to show your personality."
Break out your journal (or open a Google Doc), and start jotting down all your feels. "Journal about self-love and what you’re hoping to find in a relationship," life coach Jenn DeWall told Elite Daily. Having an idea of what you're looking for is a great way to feel confident going into your date.
Plus, setting intentions ahead of time means you'll be focused on the way your date looks at you over FaceTime, or the banter you're trading on the Netflix Party chat — instead of worrying what they think of you or whether or not your hair looks good. Trust.
One of the downsides of virtual dates is that you don't have the ambiance of swanky bar, the white noise of a coffee shop, or the golden hour rays of a local park to set the mood. But don't sweat it, you can still create romantic vibes for your FaceTime date.
For one, take advantage of your home's natural light. If that's not an option, Maria Avgitidis, CEO of Agape Match matchmaking service, previously told Elite Daily you should have two sources of light pointed toward your face. She also recommends taking the time to perfect your camera setups.
Above eye-level is prime positioning. If you're FaceTiming on a laptop, Avgitidis suggested sliding a few books underneath it to elevate it. If you're using a phone or tablet, make sure it's in a secure place during your video call. "No one likes to be 'shaked around' during a date," Avgitidis added.
On the day of the date, start getting ready early so you don't feel rushed at go-time. Give yourself the opportunity to feel confident about every part of your look. Plus, extra time to get ready lets you process your nerves fully, Blackwell says.
Last but not least, take a moment on the day-of to remind yourself you're fine as hell. "The process of feeling sexy is believing it yourself," says Bryan. "The physical things we do to express our sexiness is an extension of how we feel on the inside. If you want, make a physical list of the reasons why you’re sexy. Tape it your bathroom mirror and make it into a daily affirmation."
It's perfectly normal to feel a bit agitated and scared going into your virtual date, even if you're excited to flirt and get to know someone new. But if you take intentional time to celebrate your body, mind and spirit, you'll start feeling empowered and sexy before you know it.
