The end of the year symbolizes so many things, but they all center around one thing: a new beginning. For some reason, people decide that this is the perfect time to make those lifestyle changes.
Unfortunately, they typically only last for a few weeks and they are back to their sh*tty eating habits and unorganized chaotic selves in no time at all.
Maybe it's because they put so much pressure on this new beginning and, as a result, overwhelm themselves and fall back into their previous routines.
Personally, I think creating goals for each new season is a whole lot more effective than doing so at the beginning of every year, when just about everyone is doing the same thing.
But as a new year approaches, we all find ourselves making these overarching, completely unrealistic and redundant resolutions.
So what are the most common and basic resolutions everyone makes? Well...
20. No more drinking during the week (your couch doesn't count)
While this clearly means no drinking during the week at a bar, your couch definitely doesn't count.
The more wine you drink on your couch, the better; there just is no reason to spend excess money on overpriced drinks.
19. Stop blacking out every single time you drink
I guess the first step of this would be to eliminate the pregame from your nightly schedule, but let's not get ahead of ourselves here.
Pacing yourself is a promise you make to yourself every year... and fail within weeks.
18. Learn to embrace your legs instead of taking taxis two blocks
Taxis are the cruelest expense in a city where you can't drive. Sure, $5 here and $7 there don't seem like a lot, but when you check your account balance, it's clear to see how these charges pile up.
17. Remove "I literally can't" and any and all variations from your vocabulary
Newsflash: YOU CAN. I know, shocking, right? These phrases need to be eliminated immediately.
16. Stop dressing like Wednesday Addams
Well, not completely — but it's always a nice change to diversify your wardrobe by adding some color into it. At least try to do this before you revert to your all-black tendencies.
15. Trade in the dry shampoo for an actual shower
Yes we all know how much of a struggle it is to shower when all you want to do at the end of the day is crawl into bed. But this is the start of a new you! A cleaner you! Mmhmm...we shall see how long this lasts.
14. Make your lunch for work instead of getting an overpriced $14 salad
This seems to be a resolution we make on a weekly basis. Sadly, it only seems to last for a day or two at a time.
13. Be more tolerant of people you can't stand
This is perhaps the hardest resolution of them all, isn't it? Patience may be a virtue, but it's a trait I am surely lacking.
12. Not go shopping for an entire week
Does online shopping count or is this just physical, in-person store shopping?
11. Not sleep with your phone underneath your pillow
Stop using the excuse that you can't hear your alarm when you put in on the floor; it makes the same amount of noise.
10. Not look at your phone for one hour after posting an Instagram
This is a great testament to your willpower -- or lack thereof.
9. Make your bed before leaving for work in the morning... or ever
The only time people tend to make their beds is when they are expecting a visitor. If you are the only one sleeping in it and you have to get back in it at the end of the day, what is even the point of making it?
8. Not throw your clothes in a giant pile while you get ready
Getting ready as a female is never an easy task. We can never settle on the first item we choose and, as a result, end up trying on basically everything that is hanging inside our closets. Your room may have been spotless on Friday, but come Sunday, it looks as if a tornado hit it.
7. Stop drunk texting your ex
The sooner you stop doing this, the better... ever think maybe that's why you're still single?
6. Stop eating in the bed
Having crumbs in your bed isn't funny when it happens on a consistent basis. What happens when you bring someone home and forget the situation of your sheets?
5. Create a budget that you can actually stick to
How about we just eliminate Starbucks and call it a day?
4. Actually make it to the gym past January
The hardest part isn't signing up for a gym, it's actually going and making it a routine.
3. Lose the freshman 15 you accumulated since you were 18
You always said you were going to do this, so why not start now? Probably because you can put it off until tomorrow...
2. Leave your bed before 3 in the afternoon on the weekends
How many more hangovers is it going to take for you to realize you can actually make the most of your free time? You know all of those things you wish you could get to during the week? Well, this is the time to do them.
1. Not order every meal on Seamless for an entire weekend
Perhaps the most difficult challenge of them all is to actually learn to prepare your own food. And, yes, this goes for every single meal.