In movies and TV shows, falling in love is always portrayed as a slow, beautiful thing. It usually happens during a montage, while the happy couple laughs, talks, and goes on romantic walks through a park. It looks so peaceful and easy. But in real life, that's not always the case. Falling in love is different for everyone, but no matter how it happens for you, there are certain things you'll notice about yourself if you're falling in love. The reality is, falling in love is nerve-wracking, but exciting and scary all at the same time, so it's normal to feel like a lot of emotions are going through your heart, soul, and mind.
If you aren't sure if you're in love with the person you're currently dating, but you recognize these signs within yourself, then chances are, you might be feeling yourself falling in love. It doesn't happen overnight, and it isn't always easy. There may be ups and downs, and a lot of conflicting feelings such as doubts, nerves, and joy when you fall in love with someone. For me, falling in love with my now-fiancé was scary! It was happening, I couldn't stop it, and I didn't expect it.
Not being able to fully identify your feelings can be frustrating, but you're not alone. Here's what you might notice about yourself if those feelings spell love.
When you're falling in love, you probably feel safe with your partner, and like they need you just as much as you need them in your life. "I don't know what screams 'love' more than that," dating coach Erika Ettin previously told Elite Daily. "For most women in a relationship, they want to feel pursued, special, and secure, and men need to feel appreciated and sometimes needed."
Contrary to what you might think, it takes time to fall in love, and it doesn't just happen. "The early feel-good chemicals that are present when a couple falls 'in love' can last anywhere from six months to three years," Jen Elmquist, MA, LMFT, relationship specialist and co-host of Evine After Dark previously told Elite Daily. "After that time, if a secure attachment develops, the couple balances into a more stable, comfortable love state with one another."
If you notice that you want to make your partner a more constant part of your life, and they want to make you a part of theirs, you could be falling in love. "It’s like the merging of two lives really," Dr. Benjamin Ritter, founder of Live for Yourself Consulting and The Breakup Supplement, told Elite Daily. "Their current view of who they are in their life now includes you. You become a significant portion of that."
There are also some body language signs you'll probably notice if you're falling in love. "You'll be OK looking each other in the eye at close range — just a few inches," body language expert Traci Brown previously told Elite Daily. "That's really uncomfortable to do with people you're not intimate with." If you and your partner always look each other in the eyes or always maintain close body language, you could just be falling in love, my friend.
All relationships have issues, but if you're falling in love with your significant other, then it's likely that you notice yourselves confronting these issues together, as a team. While "the connection with your partner is effortless," as bestselling author and relationship expert Susan Winter previously told Elite Daily, you make an effort to still work through conflict. "True, there are challenges, but those challenges are met with conflict resolution," Winter added.
When you're in love, Kailen Rosenberg, master certified love, life and relationship coach, previously told Elite Daily that your partner will "get your juices going, your hormones stirring, your neurotransmitters moving and shaking."
"There is a feeling of attachment that can come with a mild possessiveness, almost a territorial vibe. When you are in love, jealousy can erupt. You are doting and giving a lot of extra attention. They might seemingly be on your mind more often. It feels fresh, new, exciting and vulnerable."
Falling in love is a great thing, and even though it can also feel a little intimidating, it's so worth it. This is an amazing new chapter in your life, so remember that you deserve happiness, and you deserve to feel loved back. Embrace it!
