It doesn’t matter if you broke up last week or six months ago — it’s totally OK to have some lingering feels for an ex. After all, feelings simply can’t be turned off like a light switch, especially when you shared a lot of history. Wouldn’t it be great if you could figure out whether you and your ex were on the same page? While it’s impossible to know with certainty that they’re still pining after you, experts say you can look out for certain signs your ex is over you.
Being aware of these signs is beneficial for many reasons. For one, it may help you to gain a sense of closure, so you aren’t stuck wondering “what if…?” If you’re secretly hoping that there’s a chance of reuniting, a reality check may be just what you need to move on more easily. Thus, you may be more apt to find someone who’s emotionally available to you.
“It’s like ripping off a bandaid: It hurts but not as long as it would holding out hope that you’ll get back together,” explains Susan Trombetti, matchmaker and CEO of Exclusive Matchmaking.
Here’s the thing: Post-breakup behavior can be exceedingly difficult to read. Just because they unfollow you on social media, for example, doesn’t mean they’re over you — in fact, it can potentially suggest the opposite, because it’s too painful to look at your pics. And just because they dropped your belongings off doesn’t mean they don’t still have feelings for you. It may actually mean that they can’t handle reminders of you lying around.
That said, experts agree that these specific behaviors may point to the possibility that they’ve moved on.