Whether it’s been six months or six years, your anniversary is an opportunity to celebrate the bond you’ve built with your boo — and possibly to brag about it, of course. And why shouldn’t you? You and bae work hard at your relationship, and you’re feeling pretty darn lucky to have them in your life. As you get ready to clink glasses, enjoy a romantic meal, and perhaps indulge in some PDA, the question becomes: Should you Instagram for your anniversary?
Before you start analyzing the ideal filter for your selfie with bae and selecting the perfect anniversary hashtag, there are definitely some factors that are important to consider, according to Pricilla Martinez, CEO of Regroop Online Life Coaching.
“Posting about your anniversary on social media can be an important milestone in a relationship,” Martinez tells Elite Daily. “It’s a proclamation that you are happy and secure enough to know it’s not a fleeting relationship. Paying public tribute to your partner can also be an opportunity to reinforce your bond by letting them and everyone who follows you know exactly how you feel. For some, these tributes can become a gauge of the level of commitment that you and your partner have for one another.”
When you post about your anniversary, you’re sending a very particular message to your followers: This is someone who I am proud to be with, and someone who I can see myself with for awhile. And obviously, that’s a wonderful message to send if it’s completely genuine. However, according to Martinez, there are circumstances under which you might want to rethink posting that pic — such as if you haven’t actually defined the relationship, and are uncertain as to where you stand.
“A public forum shouldn’t be used to get a sense of where you are with one another,” she says. “Also, if you’re doing this as a way to let other people know that your partner is in a relationship, there may be a bigger trust issue that needs to be discussed.”
Martinez also notes that you should be careful of your expectations when posting a photo on your anniversary. “If you are posting just in the hopes that your partner will profess their feelings for you in the same way, then you should reconsider,” she says. “There’s no guarantee that they will respond in the same way if they have never posted about your relationship or you before. However, if you’ve made it onto their feed before, they may consider your post incredibly sweet.”
So, is Instagramming on your anniversary a good idea or a bad idea? Ultimately, Martinez says it comes down to timing. “If your relationship isn’t in a good place or is still undefined, then don’t post something before you’re both ready,” she explains.
And if you’re really on the fence about whether or not to share a pic because the relationship is fairly new and neither of you has posted about each other on IG yet, consider having a conversation with your SO to see how they feel about it. After all, making your social media debut as a couple can be kind of a big deal.
“No matter what their feelings are about social media and posting, make sure to hear their opinion, validate it, respect it, and ultimately work together to figure out how both of you are going to use social media together,” says Mike Goldstein, founder of EZ Dating Coach. If your partner is a super private person in terms of social media, or recently got out of another relationship, for example, they may feel uncomfortable about an anniversary-related Instagram post. And a social media post is never worth compromising your partner’s feelings.
That said, if they seem averse to the idea but can’t give you a reason why, you may want to open up a larger discussion about the relationship and level of commitment to make sure you’re on the same page. And don't forget, as Goldstein points out, that a breakup down the line could make it painful to look at those Instagram photos.
"You will most likely need to remove all these pictures to make space for your potential new partner," he adds. "But then again, who wants to play scared?"
The bottom line? There is no right or wrong when it comes to posting an Instagram on your anniversary — it all comes down to the stage of your relationship, your intentions, and your expectations in posting. If you simply want to share your relationship milestone and the depth of your love with your followers, and your boo doesn’t have any qualms about you posting a pic of you both, then feel free to start browsing those filters and crafting the perfect #couplegoals caption.