As your resident Duchess of Drama, I've baited you in with an incredibly melodramatic statement. Somewhat bashfully, I admit that I'm actually very serious about this: Should you post relationship pictures on Instagram? Before you @ me for my radical take, let me have this. It's 2018, almost everyone has social media, and everyone can be the star of their own little show. When something gets shared with the "public" — whether that's a public of 600 or "145K" followers — it becomes "public" knowledge. Remember that aunt who asked you about the cute "hot dog-shaped straws" you were drinking out of at that bachelorette in Nashville?
If you broadcast your relationship on Instagram, people will notice, the same way we all notice when celebrities post photos with their partners. No one wants to admit this very real truth, but social media makes us all feel a little bit like we are celebrities. I fully have the celebrity complex. I get bummed out when I don't get enough celebratory little red hearts on Instagram. I only have 830 followers, but I pump out Insta Stories on the reg. Before long, I'll be posting the meals I cooked from Chrissy Teigen's Blue Apron as though it sponsored me... when it most definitely doesn't.
Like many celebrities who often wait to uncloak their relationships on social media (looking at you, Ariana Grande and Pete Davidson), I find it precarious to share my personal life online, even with my tiny circle. I know I sound like a big fat hypocrite because I write about dating online and I cohost a dating podcast called "51 First Dates." But when it comes to the real deal — when feelings are caught and titles are discussed — I have a harder time making the decision to share my personal life on Instagram.
What if it all implodes? Or what if it all goes well, but we still break up in a year and suddenly everyone knows? Does posting with someone jinx everything and ruin lives?!
I know that this opinion is my own, and not most peoples'. I also know that I have a crippling fear of commitment and abandonment, and so I am more wary of diving into a relationship all the way than most. (This message is brought to you by Therapy.) I have friends who tag the pants off of their new relationships. I have friends who aren't worried about getting in a fight the day after a romantic post. I also have friends who post more if they are in a fight with their SO.
But I'm starting to feel like I won't be ready to make anything Instafficialuntil I get married because I'm afraid of what people will think if it doesn't work out. To process that fear, I decided to speak to women about their experiences with relationships and Instagram, and whether they, too, were as scared of posting with a partner as I am.