6 Body Language Clues Your Partner Feels Distant From You, So You Know If Something's Up
Sometimes, even the most seemingly perfect relationships can have trouble brewing beneath the surface. But whether it be a loss of attraction or a distance between you and bae that wasn't there before, our body language can tell us things we may not know about our relationships — or ourselves for that matter. If you feel like bae is pulling away from you or from the relationship, there are some body language clues your partner feels distant from you that can help you figure out what's going on with them.
Before you dive into analyzing your partner's body language, you want to start with a baseline. "Before you start interpreting what your partner could or could not be feeling, you have to figure out what’s normal with your partner," body language expert Blanca Cobb tells Elite Daily. "Is your partner generally an affectionate person with you? Does that mean they give you hugs and kisses? Do they give you caresses on the cheek? Do they grab your tush? What do they typically do? That’s your baseline." Once you've established what your baseline is, you can start looking for these six body language clues that could mean your partner feels distant from you.
1. There's a physical distance that wasn't there before.
Every couple is different. Some couples naturally give each other a lot of personal space, while others, not so much. If you and bae were always all up on each other, and that changed all of a sudden, they could be subconsciously (or consciously) creating space between you two. "They will, many times, physically create more distance between themselves and their partner, either by turning part or all of their body away from them or choosing to position themselves across from them instead of beside them," body language expert Lisa Mitchell tells Elite Daily.
But how can you really tell if your partner is trying to create distance from you? "Is their chair at the dining room or the kitchen table or the bar stool suddenly slightly further away? Are they sitting further away?" Patti Wood, body language expert and author of Success Signals: A Guide To Reading Body Language, asks Elite Daily. "Are they not sitting with you [at all], like they suddenly have work to do? Are they suddenly sitting at a distance, looking at an electronic device?" All of these can be signs that your partner may be creating some form of physical distance between you two.
2. Their bodies are more blocked off.
The use of blocking behaviors, such as crossing your arms across your torso or crossing your legs away from someone, can be a sign of an emotional distance forming, Mitchell says.
"It can also be more subtle, like eye blocking or mouth blocking where a partner will cover their eyes or mouth partially with their hand to keep from connecting or revealing their feelings," she elaborates. "They are trying to block the connection with these maneuvers in an effort to avoid leaking negative feelings or engaging at a level that they no longer feel comfortable with."
3. Their feet are pointing away from you.
The direction a person's feet point toward can tell you lot about how they're feeling in that moment. Do they want to be there? Do they want to run as far in the opposite direction as possible? Feet "point where people want to be," Mitchell explains. "So, if you're having a conversation with your partner and their feet are pointed toward the door or nearest exit, it's an indication that they want to get out of the conversation and leave." They may not want to stick around and talk about something they no longer feel comfortable talking about, whether it be with you or just in general.
4. They used to wait that extra second to align themselves with you, and now they don't.
Were you and bae once the couple that always aligned themselves with each other? Maybe you'd wait for them to walk out of the car, or they'd wait for you to come out of the restaurant. Then suddenly, one day, they stopped waiting for you. Could that be the end of the honeymoon phase, or could it be more? "Are they not waiting that [extra] second? To me, that’s a pretty major shift in a relationship because you tend to move as a unit when you're a couple," Wood explains. "If they’ve done that, and suddenly that shifts, to me that’s interesting."
5. They're not as affectionate as they used to be.
If you've set your baseline for what was normal for your partner, and you start to notice a change from that baseline, it may be time to consider whether or not your partner is pulling away from you. "It’s like, 'OK, wait a second. Maybe they are getting a little less affectionate, because normally I get a lot of hugs and kisses, and now not so much. I’m not getting as many,'" Cobb says. "So, that’s how you figure it out."
6. The affection is still somewhat there, but the quality is different.
Maybe bae is being affectionate with you as consistently as usual, but it's different. "Maybe instead of a passionate kiss, it’s like a peck on the lips, or your lips barely touch, it’s like a blow kiss, or a cheek kiss or something," Cobb points out. "So, that quality changes, then that’s like, 'Wait a second, what’s going on?' It should be a head scratcher and make you wonder, 'Is there something going on that I don’t know about?'"
There might be, but the funny thing about body language is that you may not know what's going on with your partner just as much as they may not know either. They may not realize they're creating a distance between you two because it could be subconscious. If you begin to notice these body language clues when it comes to bae, it may be best to talk about it. Ask them if something's been on their mind lately. It could help clear the air, and get you and your boo back to normal sooner rather than later.
Check out the “Best of Elite Daily” stream in the Bustle App for more stories just like this!