Sometimes people can say things they don't mean. We're all human — none of us are immune to bending the truth. But thankfully, knowing the basics of body language can help us decipher how the people around us actually feel. This is especially helpful when it comes to love. There are several body language clues your partner isn't in love with you, even when they say they say they are, that can be helpful to take note of if you feel they might be saying things they don't mean. According to body language expert Craig Baxter, looking at the body language in any relationship that you have doubts about can be helpful. "When a relationship is in trouble, it's body language that can reveal issues," Baxter tells Elite Daily.
Yes, believe it or not, looking at your significant other's body language is a great way to see things that you might not notice otherwise. If you're worried about something in your relationship that you don't feel you can talk to your partner about (which might be an issue in and of itself), look at their eyes, look at their hands, and look at them. The way their body moves might be able to give you what you're looking for. Baxter filled me in on what to look out for, and it's pretty eye-opening.
If you and your partner have sex on the daily, and then it stops all of a sudden, you're probably going to notice. But Baxter insists that it rarely happens like this.
"When love is no longer felt, neither is the desire to touch or be touched," Baxter says. "You’ll find any advance you make is swiftly rejected. However, this behaviour doesn’t just happen overnight... so be mindful of this."
Like Baxter mentioned, a person who isn't in love won't be as willing to physically connect with you. If there is "no longer a desire to be intimate (such as kissing, hugging, sex) with you," your partner might not be in love with you.
When this happens, "you therefore become more like a friend, as only those we select as a lover are allowed access to our intimate areas... and this is only granted in a relationship when love is felt." Maybe you stopped having sex every day, or maybe they've put off having sex for longer than you thought they would. Either way, they probably aren't feeling it.
Maybe your partner stops wanting to hold your hand, or just stops wanting to cuddle. Whatever it is, watch out, because it could be indicative of something more, even if it starts slowly.
Eye contact may seem like a pretty obvious body language signal to look out for. Baxter emphasizes this too, telling Elite Daily that a "repeated lack of eye contact," is a pretty clear sign that your partner isn't feeling the love. So take stock of how they're communicating, and if they're being shifty when they talk to you.
When you love someone, you enjoy being around them, plain and simple. Sure, you might get sick of them from time to time, but the fact remains that they make you happy, and the joy is still there. But according to Baxter, someone who doesn't love you won't be excited to see you. "A lack of enthusiasm and happiness in your presence," could point to a lack of love, he says.
Last, but certainly not least, if you think your partner is lying to you Baxter recommends observing how they speak and move at the same time.
"Watch for contradictory gestures though, such as your partner saying 'There is nothing wrong, ok?' spoken with an intense arm fold and pursed lips," he says. This could reveal "a concealed or unspoken issue," and might even mean they aren't being completely honest.
It's not easy to deal with the fact that someone might not love you, especially if it's someone that you love or care deeply about. And even though body language can be an incredibly helpful tool, you should always feel like you can talk to your partner about your concerns. A good partner will always listen openly to what you have to say, and if they don't, then it might be time to have an entirely different conversation.
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