15 Starter Questions To DM Your Crush That'll Get The Conversation Going

When you’re crushing hard on someone, social media can provide a slew of perks. Not only are you privy to more pics of the object of your affection, but you’re also exposed to a wealth of useful info about them — and those deets can definitely come in handy when you build up the courage to strike up a convo. Best of all, social networks all offer a casual, convenient way of getting in touch with someone you like. Not sure what to say? Having the right starter questions to DM your crush is the key to getting off on the right foot.

A question is without a doubt the most effective way to reach out when reaching out to someone via DM, whether on Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, Snapchat, or another platform entirely. After all, a thoughtful question is more likely to encourage your crush to respond than a mere comment or observation, and it also provides a valuable opportunity to get to know them better. But since this may be one of your first social media exchanges, you’ll want to be strategic about what you ask. As a general rule, the best questions to DM are short, generally lighthearted, and show your interest to some degree, no matter how subtle. It’s also a good idea to ask open-ended questions whenever possible, as they’ll likely inspire a longer response (and thus potentially spark a deeper conversation) than yes-or-no questions.

Still at a loss for words? Fret not — these 15 questions are pretty much foolproof for getting the digital sparks flying.

To Get The Ball Rolling

Viktor Solomin/Stocksy

1. I didn’t realize you knew [name of mutual friends]! Wanna do a group hang soon?

2. Wow, where was this pic taken? I’ve been dying to travel to [city/country name] for a while now, and I’m thinking that should be my first stop.

3. Quick question from your fellow classmate. Are you as confused as I am about this new assignment?

4. Has anyone ever told you that you look like [celebrity’s name]? (I’ve heard flattery will get you everywhere.)

5. Had no idea another human could love [shared interest] as much as me. When did you start getting into that?

To Get Your Flirt On

6. If you think someone’s cute, is sliding into their DMs too obvious of an approach? (Asking for myself.)

7. I could have sworn I saw you at [name of bar, restaurant, or other event/location] last weekend. Was that you, or do you just have a doppelgänger running around?

8. I figured if we’re brave enough to double tap each other’s photos, we should be able to DM. Now, real talk: How many attempts did it take to get this perfect shot?

9. Did you know that posting pics with pets is a bona fide thirst trap? (You nailed it, BTW.)

10. Still LOLing over your story from last night. Can you keep the hilarious posts coming to power me through these #sundayscaries?

To Instigate An IRL Hang

Kike Arnaiz/Stocksy

11. Here’s the big question: Where are you watching the [sports team’s name] game tomorrow? I feel like having two fans (that’s us) in the same room could be good luck.

12. Hey, I noticed you’re really into [hobby/skill] — it just so happens I’ve been getting really into it, too. Would you mind helping me out with [related project]?

13. Since you’re a fellow [artist/band name] enthusiast, thought you should know that they’re coming to town. Want to catch them live?

14. Looking for a playdate for my lonely pup, are you and yours free this Saturday?

15. Dying to check out this new [craft beer, shuffleboard] bar. When are you free to guzzle a few [IPAs, diet cokes] with me?

Don’t be afraid to tweak these questions and make them your own, either. The more you can personalize the question to your crush’s interests, or the nature of your connection, the better. Have a few winning starter questions of your own? Be sure to share them in the comments. And remember: Ain’t no shame in your DM-sliding game. You could be just one well-crafted question away from winning over the object of your affection.