Let me be totally honest: Being married is super fun. It's like having a slumber party every night with the coolest, cutest, sexiest person you know. But before I met my husband, I wasn't sure I even wanted to get married. It was only after he swept me off my feet — when I asked myself, “Why do I feel so comfortable with him? It feels like we’ve been dating for longer than we actually have, doesn’t it?” — that I knew. It took being in sync with someone for me to realize that I never actually knew what it’s like to really love someone before.
Meeting your "forever person" is a unique experience, and no two connections are exactly alike. It'll make you question everything you did in relationships prior, and it feels awesome in the best way possible. That's not to say relationships that end after a few weeks, months, or years can't be valuable, life-changing, incredibly meaningful experiences — they absolutely can be. Any time someone new enters your life, you can learn profound lessons from your relationship with them. But when you fall in love with the love of your life, that bond might produce some of your happiest, most fulfilling times. When you've met someone amazing, it's natural to wonder if they're going to be around for years to come.
If this sounds like how you are feeling about your SO, then you might have found your forever person. But if you are still unsure, here are some clues that your love could be lifelong.
Your Forever Person Makes You Feel Comfortable
When I met my husband, I immediately felt like I could be myself. No matter what weird personality quirk I had — especially the ones I used to try to keep under wraps — I still felt comfortable enough to let my husband see them all. It's like if I get woken up while I'm sleeping, I don't mind letting him see me turn into Attila the Hun. I don't need to keep that morning moodiness a secret.
When you find your forever person, you'll feel totally comfortable just being you. Feeling comfortable is a sign of being "at peace" with your partner, Heather Kristian Strang, spiritual author, guide, and matchmaker, previously told Elite Daily. "When you are at peace, it is easy to love, it is easy to laugh, it is easy to feel joy ... You and your partner can clearly make decisions that positively impact your futures, you can plan the greatest getaway, the greatest party, the greatest life ever,” she said. You won't feel like you need to put on an act for them, and you'll know that they are there for you, just as you are.
Your Forever Person Makes You Feel Adoration
In prior relationships, although I would have fun with the people I was with, that's all it was: fun. With my husband, I feel a deep adoration for everything he is. I admire his kindness, his intellect, and his general goodness. I truly adore him, and I never thought I would feel that way about someone.
Once you find yourself with this person of yours, you'll realize that you not only love them — you cherish them. According to Dr. LeslieBeth Wish, licensed clinical psychotherapist and founder of LoveVictory.com, “Healthy, lasting love finds its own ‘cruising gear’ where you feel fulfilled, happy, positive, and sure of your choice of partner,” she said. Your forever person will be someone who you could endlessly admire because you truly like and value everything about who they are.
Your Forever Person Makes You Feel Connected
Sometimes, I'll pick up my phone to text my husband something, and I'll look down to see that he just texted me that exact same thing. Other times, he'll be about to say something, and I'll say it first. While we both get freaked out and laugh at these unusual occurrences, the reality is, we love them because they make us feel connected. You'll feel in sync with this person like you've never felt in sync with anyone before. And because of that, you'll know it's real.
"The more we can 'micro bond,' where we engage in small actions that keep us connected and strengthen the connection, the more effective and lasting the bigger bonding moments are," Dr. Joshua Klapow, clinical psychologist and host of The Kurre and Klapow Show, previously told Elite Daily. In other words, the more you can connect over something as small as a simple text — or an inside joke, or a shared favorite song, or a tradition of always splitting the tiramisu at your neighborhood Italian restaurant — the stronger you'll feel during major relationship milestones, too.
Your Forever Person Makes You Feel Empathy
Another sign that you have met your forever person or soulmate is when their pain starts to become yours. Not literally, of course, but it could be something as simple as getting extra worked up when something crappy happens to your partner.
“Love means I deeply care. I deeply respect. I have a desire to protect. I see the depth and value and truth of who that person is and I value that,” love and relationship coach Kailen Rosenberg previously told Elite Daily, adding, “There is a calm, a knowing, a strength ... Real love has genuine care and concern for the person you love.” Whether they didn’t get a job they wanted or someone was a jerk at the grocery store, when you find yourself wanting to fight their battles, you know that you are in it for the long haul.
Your Forever Person Makes You Feel Forgiving
When you’ve met the one, there is nothing about this person that would make you want to run away. Rather than ignoring their shortcomings, you embrace them as part of what makes you partner uniquely them.
As author and relationship expert Susan Winter previously told Elite Daily, “In love means that you've weathered the storms of your partner's negative qualities, and still choose to remain in the relationship. Your love is unconditional. It's all-inclusive as you accept the positive and the negative aspects of your mate." While the idea of listening to someone chew for the rest of your life may seem terrifying, when they are your soulmate, it’s like music to your ears.
Your Forever Person Makes You Feel Secure
I used to feel pangs of immature jealousy with former flames. I didn't like the insecurity that came with other women flirting with my partner and I never really felt a deep, significant trust with my partner. With my husband, it's the exact opposite: I feel no jealousy because I know what we have is amazing. I feel secure. He makes me feel like I am the only person that could ever matter to him — and the only person that ever will.
There are plenty of reasons a person might experience jealousy in a relationship, including a personal history with infidelity or trust issues, or even your personality type. But as Lesli Doares, couples consultant and marriage coach at Foundations Coaching, previously told Elite Daily, "'The one' makes you feel loved and secure. You are able to be yourself and feel accepted. They make you want to be your best self, and they bring that out in you.” Occasionally feeling jealous doesn't mean that you and your partner aren't right for each other. But hopefully, with the right person, you'll be able to share these feelings safely, be heard and supported, and work together to find the right solution.
Your Forever Person Makes You Feel Blissful
Being in a relationship is fun, but there needs to be so much more to it. When I met my husband, I not only felt happy, but I felt deeply blissful. The bliss I feel with him is more like a spiritual joy, and to me, it feels like it's more than an everyday "happy." Happy is something I feel when the sun is shining or when something went well at work. Bliss, though, is a state of mind: It's the positive, content feeling I have all the time just knowing that my husband exists.
"A meaningful marker of a relationship's health is observing what it brings out in you and in your life," clinical psychologist Dr. Rebekah Montgomery previously told Elite Daily. "When we are in healthy relationships, we are often happier and healthier." When you meet your forever person, you'll experience a really new, really pleasant feeling of true bliss. You'll wonder why you settled for the superficial feelings you felt with others before.
Your Forever Person Makes You Feel Longing
No matter if I had a good day or a bad day, I crave my husband at the end of it. It's more than just wanting to share things with him — it's that I feel like I really need to be in the same space he is to reset myself. Before, I valued my own personal space more than my relationship space, but with him, it feels better being together.
In a true partnership, you'll be surprised at how much you actually want to be with them. As Dr. Klapow previously explained, “You think about them, you worry about them, you have a physical need to be close to them, you may feel confident with them but you may worry about the status of your relationship tremendously because it means so much to you.” It won't be that you want to see them to go to the movies or go to a fancy dinner. Instead, you'll just crave their physical presence. The best part: Your forever person will crave you, too.
Your Forever Person Makes You Feel Powerful
In my prior relationships, I always felt like if it didn't work out, I could just leave and abandon it. It felt easy enough to jump ship if I saw problems. Now, though, it's the opposite: In my marriage, I feel like problems don't stand a chance. With my husband, not only do I never want to leave, I feel like we can take on absolutely anything that life throws at us.
With your forever person, you'll know that you can handle it all. It won't matter if you are nervous or unsure about your path in life. As behavioral scientist Clarissa Silva previously explained to Elite Daily, someone you love usually feels like your “ideal partner because you already know they will complement your goals and desires and assist in fulfilling your dreams.” Being with your forever person will feel make you feel capable of absolutely anything.
While it is true that "when you know, you know," sometimes, it can help to have a little more guidance. If you feel the things on this list, chances are, you've found that person.
Heather Kristian Strang, spiritual author, guide, and matchmaker
Dr. LeslieBeth Wish, licensed clinical psychotherapist and founder of LoveVictory.com
Kailen Rosenberg, love and relationship coach
Susan Winter, author and relationship expert
Lesli Doares, couples consultant and marriage coach at Foundations Coaching
Dr. Rebekah Montgomery, clinical psychologist
Clarissa Silva, behavioral scientist
Editor's Note: This story has been updated by Elite Daily Staff.
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