How To Tell If He's Really Ready For A Relationship
It feels great when you've been dating someone for a while, finally work the nerve up to have the "what are we?" conversation and he actually makes the ask.
You no longer have to cringe inside when he introduces you as his "friend," or wonder if he's really feeling you like he says he is. This is real. This is it.
You have officially been chosen.
Graduating from the infamous grey area to official girlfriend status is a fine feeling—except when you're still wondering whether or not they are truly ready for the relationship.
Not everyone is actually as up for the challenge as they believe they are. Here are a few signs that should tell you whether or not he is really prepared to be in a committed relationship—no matter what his mouth is saying.
1. He says he wants a relationship, but doesn't want titles.
So how exactly is he going to introduce you now? And what about the nature of your relationship is really going to change?
You, my love, are on the verge of being okie-doked. It's true, he likes you, but his, "I want to be in a relationship, but let's not do titles" proposition is entirely game.
Words mean things, which is why he is speaking with you about being in a relationship in the first place. If he wants you to be his girlfriend for real, then what exactly is stopping him from telling anyone else that you're his girlfriend?
Let this fella go and figure out what he really wants. You deserve better than a guy who wants to fill you with uncertainties.
2. He just broke up with his ex.
Don't let him pull a Kylie Jenner on you by hopping out of a relationship and diving right into something with you.
Sure, it's possible to be completely over someone (especially if you were already mentally out of the relationship before you left), but you want a guy who takes his time with relationships instead of using you as a cushion for his healing process.
You don't have to drop this guy, but you definitely need to take things a little slower.
3. He just had a kid.
Having a kid doesn't always make a guy an ineligible bachelor, but if his baby is only a few months old, then you should probably rethink some things.
A new baby requires oodles of time and attention — specifically if the little human is the first born. It's not likely that he can give his first foray into fatherhood the proper attention and cater to a new relationship at the same time.
He needs to deal with one new major milestone at the time, and if he's a decent guy at all, that will be his new child and not you.
4. His finances or job situation are in shambles.
It is really tough trying to get your finances in order, job hunt and foster a new relationship. Starting a romantic commitment is supposed to be gratifying, not merely added to a list of responsibilities.
It's not fair to him to struggle with all of these tasks. Let him get his life together.
5. His mother rules his life.
There's nothing wrong with a man who respects and loves his mama to pieces. Everything is wrong with a man who allows her to govern every aspect of his life.
If what mama says always goes now, that's exactly what the game plan will be when you two make it official.
6. He already has a jealous streak.
Admit it; a little jealousy is cute because it feels good to know someone doesn't want to lose you to the next guy who comes around. Still, you should know the difference between reasonable and irrational jealousy.
It's usually a symptom of control issues.
7. There are major things he still doesn't know about you.
Ah yes, sometimes people aren't ready for a relationship with you because you are the one who didn't prepare them.
If you've gotten the coveted "ask" from a guy you're feeling, but you know there are some very important pieces of information about you that he still isn't aware of, he isn't ready to be with the you because he isn't working with the full picture.
Speak your truth (honesty works, people), and then if he accepts it, move forward.