Relationships

5 Ways To Keep Your Long-Term Relationship Hot That Have Nothing To Do With Sex

by Alison Segel

Being in a long-term relationship is amazing, but it also has its faults. For example, how do you keep the magic alive with someone you see and hang out with, like, every day, especially after you've both become so comfortable farting and wearing face masks in front of each other. It can be hard to know how to keep a long-term relationship hot after you've been in it for a while. It's like having the same meal over and over and over again. Even if pizza is my favorite food, after a while, I'm gonna get bored with having it every day. I can't just be f*cking pizza every day of my life! I gotta spice things up. But how?

Well, I believe that this can be done in ways that are not necessarily sexual, because you should be able to connect with your partner in other ways, right? Your relationship should be exciting in ways that don't always involve hooking up, and this means being able to get into your significant other's head to really turn them on.

So here are some ways to keep a long-term relationship hot with things beside sex. Because there's more to life and love than hooking up.

1. Crank Up The Flirting

Just because you're already locked down, doesn't mean you and your significant other shouldn't flirt with each other. In fact, this is probably the number one activity that will help to keep your relationship alive. Also, flirting, IMO, can be more fun than hooking up. It's what builds up that sexual energy in the first place.

So send cute texts throughout the day with your partner. Tease them. Lock eyes with them across the room for a few seconds too long. Hold hands. Play wrestle. Continue some of the fun, flirty activities you did when you first met, and it will help to keep the romance alive for the entirety of your relationship.

2. Don't Let Up On Thoughtful Gestures And Presents

You know what's hot? Knowing someone's thinking about you — even if it's something small and simple. I once dated a guy who had a cup of coffee waiting for me by the bedside table every morning before I woke up. It made me want to jump his bones all the time. Once, I called him on my way home from work complaining about my boss, and when I got to his place, he had a bubble bath waiting for me. I had never been so turned on in my life.

Having sex is easy. You can do it with anyone. But you know what's truly erotic? Anticipating someone's needs, and meeting them. We want to feel truly heard and seen by the people we like and devote our time to. So if you really want to turn your partner on in your long-term relationship, surprise them with small, thoughtful gestures or gifts or meet their everyday needs. It's the best kind of relationship orgasm you can have.

3. Have Frequent Date Nights

Just because you're finally in a relationship, doesn't mean you should stop dating. It's great to get comfortable with your partner — staying in, having Netflix nights, living mostly in sweatpants. However, that can make the spark die pretty early on. Don't turn your romantic partner into a roommate because you've stopped going out on dates. You still need to court them, even after you've left the typical courting phase.

So instead, make a plan once a week to actually dress nicely and do something fun and exciting together — just the two of you. Get out of the house. Be adventurous. Make out in the street if you want to. It will help keep your LTR from getting stale.

4. Spend A Little Time Apart

I usually miss my significant other most after I have a night out with my single friends. No offense to them, but dating seems like a bit of a war zone of failed dating-app dates, ghosting, and STD scares. Am I wrong? You know I'm right.

So if you really want to keep your relationship special, spend time apart. Keep your independence, and hang out with your single friends. It'll make you value your relationship, your boo, and the time you spend together even more.

5. Listen To Your Partner

I masturbate to the idea of men listening to me, paying attention to what I say, and then remembering it later on. That's hotter than any sex I've ever had. So if you want your long-term relationship to be ~en fuego~, then listen to and pay attention to your partner. Do they want you to start taking the trash out? Do it. Did they mention they wanted to see a movie? Surprise them by buying tickets for a date night. We all just want to know our partner cares and listening to your partner is the best way to do that.

Sex isn't the only way to spice up your relationship. Surprisingly, intimacy really starts with emotional vulnerability, too. So before you head to the bedroom, try to stimulate your partner's brain and emotions first. It might be what you need to keep your long-term relationship alive.

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