Being in a long-term relationship comes with a ton of awesome perks, but after a while, you and bae feel the need to reignite the spark. If you've been wondering how to keep your relationship sexy after you've been together forever, don't fret. Although it definitely requires a bit of work, the good news is that mixing things up can also be a lot of fun.
No matter how fiery things were in the beginning, it's totally natural for the heat to simmer down. "It's absolutely normal to become bored in a long-term relationship; this is a major challenge for married couples, too," relationship expert Susan Winter previously told Elite Daily. "Though the routine of a habitual partnership provides security, it's also prone to boredom. Couples need to keep investing in their relationship in order for it to flourish."
If the thought of reinvigorating your relationship sounds daunting, don't be nervous. It's important to realize that all of the work doesn't have to be only your responsibility. Keeping the passion going is something that both of you can work on. A team effort! So, if things with bae have felt a little too predictable, here are some fun ways to keep things spicy.
According to sex therapist Rachel Hoffman, planning date nights are a great way to start reigniting the fire. Aim to go out once a week and alternate who plans the weekly date, to ensure both of you are feeding the relationship. "This way there is excitement guaranteed each week and the obligation doesn't fall on one partner to make it happen," Hoffman previously told Elite Daily. "Date night is extremely important. Remembering the foundation of the relationship and why you are choosing one another is essential in recreating the spark.”
If it's been a while since you and bae have been out of your comfort zones, going on a trip together may be just what the doctor ordered. “Not only will you learn new skills for enhancing communication, managing conflict, a renewed sense of commitment to one another, and deepening intimacy. But you also have a built-in vacation filled with romantic settings, dinners, and relaxation,” behavioral scientist Clarissa Silva previously told Elite Daily.
Even though not everyone is comfortable with PDA, finding simple ways to physically connect with your partner outside of the bedroom can be surprisingly satisfying. "You can do this anywhere, even at a restaurant,” certified love coach Nikki Leigh previously told Elite Daily. “Take your partner's hand and caress their hand with yours. You can run your fingers along the base of their hair and play with their hair and their shoulders. These are very simple, but they are playful and intimate and build closeness with your partner that you can enjoy anywhere and any time.”
Just because a relationship has long left the honeymoon phase doesn't mean the fun should stop. Finding new ways to enjoy each other's company can help keep the relationship exciting. "Couples who play and explore with each other report higher relationship satisfaction,” relationship and well-being coach Shula Melamed previously told Elite Daily. So don't underestimate how much new experiences can add to your relationship dynamic.
Ultimately, most long term relationships will get to a point where both partners might need to start putting in a bit more work to keep one another actively engaged. Fortunately, if you're willing to do this, then chances are it's going to make your connection even stronger.
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