6 Signs Your Relationship Is Working Smoothly Because Good Things Take Time
Far from awkward first dates and feeling sheepish about double texting — settling into a relationship can feel like taking a relaxing breath. No matter how long you've been dating your partner, you may already have noticed some signs your relationship is working smoothly. If you and your boo are totally open and honest, you're starting to feel like you can really depend on them for anything, and if you get a sense of comfort from having them around — your relationship is probably super solid, and working super smoothly.
Of course, even the strongest relationships can have their problems. No one is smooth all the time, and whether you fight on Tuesdays about who is taking the trash out or you can never decide on where to go for dinner — a smooth and stable relationship doesn't mean a relationship with no problems ever. In fact, it can mean a relationship where the problems get worked out in a healthy way. Every relationship looks different, and whatever feels right for you and your boo is what's right for you and your boo.
Here are six signs your relationship is working smoothly, because sometimes the best things can fly under the radar.
You Can Be Yourself
Maybe you can sing all the words to every song in the car with your boo or you're not afraid to show them your pimple cream — being able to be yourself can be a huge sign of a smooth relationship.
Hiding parts of yourself can be totally tiring and can cause some major friction. Being open and honest about things like what food or movies you're into, how often you like to have sex, how many hours you need for a full night's sleep (or any other things that make you, you) can be super important when it comes to your relationship running smoothly.
You Can Handle Conflict
Fighting in relationships isn't just natural — honestly, it can be healthy, too. A smooth relationship often means that you and your boo can handle conflict in a healthy way, and can directly state what you're feeling when you disagree about something.
While fighting all the time is no fun for anyone, being able to speak up when your feelings are hurt or have serious conversations when the going gets tough, can be a big sign of a relationship running smoothly. Life isn't always sunshine and rainbows, but if you and your boo can work through the cloudy days — your relationship is running super smoothly.
You Take Time Apart
Whether every Wednesday is a #girlsnight or you need some alone time on Sunday mornings to meal prep for the week, having designated time to yourself can be super important in a relationship. Although you may love to do a ton of the same activities, making sure that you both are still your own people and maintaining your individuality can help a relationship run super smoothly.
Taking time apart will look different for every relationship. if you and your boo live together, it may look like your boo walking the dog while you check the mail. Whatever it may be, taking "you-time" can be essential for a stable relationship.
You Don't Need To Prove Or Hide Anything
Relationships mean constantly learning and sharing things about each other that you didn't previously know. Being able to listen to those stories, while offering support, can be a total sign of a smooth relationship.
If your boo discloses to you that they used to be a champion figure skater or that they love Norwegian Black Metal, rather than responding, "Um, no you don't?" it can be helpful to say something like, "Wow, I didn't know that about you! I'd love to hear more." Being able to understand that your partner is a whole person outside of your relationship will create a safe space for your boo. Neither of you need to keep secrets or hide any parts of yourselves, especially when memories or stories come to the surface.
You don't need to be happy all day, everyday. You don't even need to be happy everyday. But a smooth relationship means that the person you're with makes you feel a little bit lighter — you enjoy spending time with them and you don't have to force anything.
Being happy in a relationship looks different for everyone. Maybe you deleted your Tinder or you're planning on living together next spring. Of course, it's impossible to be happy all the time. And being able to talk to your partner when you're feeling unhappy about what you need or how they can best support you in those not so happy times, can be super important as well.
You Can Lean On Them
If you know your partner will always be there for you, and you don't have to question if they'll text you back or come to your birthday party — consistency can be a super big part of a smooth relationship. Feeling safe and secure with a partner means you can relax.
If you're having a terrible day or you're going through something super hard, knowing that your parter will be there to support you is incredibly important in building a long-term relationship. Being able to accept your boo's help and lean on them can be a big sign of a smooth relationship.
Of course, every relationship is different, and if you and your partner are honest with each other and mutually supportive — your relationship is totally smooth, no matter what. If you're feeling like you could use more support from your boo, try talking to them about what you're feeling and what they could do to show up for you. Relationships take time to build, but you deserve to feel supported every step of the way.