There’s something magical that happens when two perfectly compatible personality types get together. The relationship not only works on a practical level, thanks to shared values and priorities, but it actually brings out the best in both partners, too, allowing each individual to grow in ways they never thought possible. And you may be surprised to learn that the Myers-Briggs personality pairings that have the longest relationships are actually pretty similar across multiple traits.
While there’s a longstanding belief that opposites attract, that isn’t necessarily the case. That definitely doesn’t mean you have to date someone with your same exact personality — but keep in mind that some of the most compatible pairings have two to three type preferences in common. And some type preferences may have more weight than others. For example, a shared preference for Introversion or Extraversion doesn’t typically matter as much as the last three scales (S/N, T/F, and J/P), which play a powerful role in how we communicate, prioritize, and make decisions. Couples who share either a Sensing or Intuitive preference usually have a similar world view, while those who have a Thinking or Feeling preference in common will often express and receive affection the same way.
So, wondering which personality types are a match made in heaven? These pairings are primed to enjoy a long-lasting partnership.
ENFJ & INFP
The Protagonist and The Mediator are two peas in a pod because they share several key things in common: a preference for serious, committed relationships, excellent listening skills, and a willingness to go above and beyond to express their love. That means both personalities in this pairing are sure to feel appreciated, heard, and cared for.
According to researchers Paul Tieger and Barbara Barron-Tieger, who studied couples that shared preferences on certain scales, Intuitive Feelers experience a relationship satisfaction rate of 73% when paired with people who share their N/F preference. It makes sense, too: Intuitive Feelers have an unparalleled capacity for empathy, and a persistent desire to help the people they care about to realize their full potential.
Both of these personality types value harmony, and since they’re able to easily read each other and communicate how they’re feeling, they’re able to respectfully resolve conflicts with ease. They’re also both idealistic by nature, which can come in handy for supporting each other’s goals and dreams, and navigating tough challenges.
ISTJ & ESTP
This is a winning combo in part because both types are Sensing, Thinking personalities, which means they’re pragmatic, focus on facts over feelings, and make decisions based on logic. Not to mention, neither of them fears conflict or takes confrontation personally, so there’s no chance that issues will get swept under the rug.
While they differ on the last set of traits, a Judger and Perceiver can balance each other out quite nicely. The Perceiver (ESTP) has no problem letting the Judger (ISTJ) do all the planning and keep their lives in order, and can also help the Judger to be a tad more flexible and spontaneous.
Talk about a power couple: The quick-thinking Entrepreneur (ESTP) is full of boundless energy and innovative ideas, while the dependable, cautious ISTJ is an excellent problem-solver and has just the right realistic mindset to help them rein it in. They’re both motivated by accomplishing tasks and achieving goals, so this duo is bound to conquer anything they take on, whether it’s starting a blog together or co-founding a business.
ISFJ & ESFJ
It’s probably no surprise that these two personalities are so compatible — after all, they share three out of four of the same preferences: Sensing, Feeling, and Judging. Both types are warm-hearted, supportive, patient, and nurturing by nature, so when they decide to build a relationship together, they tend to form incredibly strong, long-lasting bonds.
Another conclusion that Tieger and Barron-Tieger reaped from their research is that couples who share both the Sensing and Judging traits boast a relationship satisfaction rate of 79%. People with the Sensing-Judging style tend to be traditionally-minded, prefer following routines, and enjoy serving others. Their shared Sensing preference means they enjoy talking about a lot of the same topics. As Feelers, not only are they both very aware of and sensitive to each other’s emotional needs, but they also express affection freely and in the same way. And two Judgers can easily plan for the future together, whether that means coming up with a detailed itinerary for their next #baecation or budgeting and setting financial goals.
Basically, The Defender and The Consul are kindred spirits on almost every level. The only difference is that the Introverted ISFJ may be a bit reserved when it comes to expressing their thoughts and feelings, and that's precisely why they need the ESFJ to help encourage those open heart-to-hearts.
FYI — while these pairings seem to be straight up made for each other, they aren't the only Myers-Briggs personality types that are compatible. Every personality has at least several types that tend to be a solid fit for relationships. When it comes down to it, the key is to find someone with enough similarities to minimize conflict, but enough differences to keep things interesting.