There’s an art to texting after a first date. And no, it doesn’t involve reaching out after a certain number of days, waiting for them to make the first move or any other sort of game playing. What you say is far more important than when you say it — and whether you know it or not, the right message can not only reinforce your interest but also potentially lay the groundwork for a second date. Luckily, there are a number of different texts to send someone after a first date that are sure to keep the momentum going.
First, let’s cover the basics. There’s no need to wait for a set amount of time before you follow up. In fact, shooting your date a text the day after you met is a great way to let them know they’re on your mind while the lingering excitement from your first hang is still fresh. There’s also no need to apologize if it didn’t go as well as you’d hoped. Not every great relationship started with fireworks on the first date. So, if it felt a bit lackluster but you’re hoping for another shot, you can just be honest and upfront about that.
Of course, what you say in your text will depend on how the date went, and what your goal/intention is going forward. Regardless of whether you’re seeking to reiterate your interest, gauge their interest in you, or get another date in the works, you can rely on these oh-so-smooth texts to do all the work for you.
When it didn’t go as planned, but you want a second chance.
1. Second time’s a charm, eh? I’m game if you are.
2. Phew, glad we got that first date out of the way — how about we try that again, now that we can relax a little?
3. If I seemed a little off last night, it’s probably because I was feeling off. I still had fun, though! So, let me know if you’re down to reunite.
When it went well, but you want to play it cool.
4. You make it home OK last night? Given all the imbibing, figured I’d check and make sure.
5. What was the name of that [TV show, movie] you told me to check out again? Want to give it a try (and get back to you with a full review, of course).
6. Still thinking about that bomb [name of meal/drink] we had last night. Just me?
When you had a great time — and want to show your appreciation.
7. Thanks again for such a fun night out — I honestly think that was exactly what I needed after a stressful work week.
8. That [name of bar/restaurant] you took me to was straight fire, so clearly you have stellar taste. Not gonna lie, already dreaming of going back ASAP…
9. Definitely feeling tired today after our epic hang last night. Definitely worth it.
10. I mean, we should probably write the book on first dates.
When you’re eager to book a second date.
11. Congrats to us for surviving the first date unscathed! I think a joint celebration is in order.
12. Not sure how we’re going to top that date, but I’m willing to try... HBU?
13. Can’t stop laughing about that story you told about [xyz subject]. When will I get to hear more of your hilarious tales?
14. Thanks for letting me choose the restaurant last night, hope it lived up to all the hype! So… same time next week? I’ll even let you pick the location this time.
Whatever you do, keep this in mind: The number one rule for texting after a first date is that there are no rules. So, if you find yourself obsessing over what to say — and deleting and rewriting your messages for fear of saying the "wrong" thing — take a deep breath. Remind yourself that if you two had a connection, the exact wording of your text won't matter much, because the spark is already there. Now all you have to do is fan the flames.