6 Freeing Things You'll Only Feel When You're Finally Over Your Ex

by Alison Segel

I recently got over one of my exes, and let me tell you, that feeling is one hell of a drug. I can breathe again. I listen to the radio without crying. I go on social media without worrying that a picture I don't want to see will pop up. I go to parties he might show up at because I don't care if he'll be there.

And those are just some of the signs you're over your ex. So hallelujah, I'm over him. Thank you, Goddesss of getting over guys who are bad for you.

Do you want to find out if you've moved on from your past relationship? If you're feeling some of these things, then you probably already are.

1. You'll Be Happy When They Move On

Stocksy/Andreas Gradin

If you are truly over your ex, then you will be happy when they move on. You won't feel any animosity, resentment, or jealousy toward their new partner, either. You won't compare yourself, question their relationship, or try to win your ex back to satiate your own ego.

When you are finally over your past, you are willing to accept the present, even if that means your former lover has found someone new to love. You might even like their photos on Instagram, or wish them congratulations. Hell, you're happy for them! Everyone deserves love!

2. You Won't Feel Anything When You Stalk Their Social Media

Or, even better, you won't be stalking them anymore at all.

I recently got bored and decided to check up on an ex's social media, and I was surprised to find out I felt nothing. His successes didn't make me jealous or happy. I wasn't curious about the women who were liking or commenting on his photos. I didn't think he looked hot, and I didn't think he looked ugly either.

Instead, my reaction was more along the lines of "who is this complete stranger I dated once?"

When you're truly over someone, you feel indifferent toward their presence — and their social media presence, too.

3. You Won't Text Them If You See Them Driving


Texting your former lover when you see them driving is the same as texting an ex to tell them they were in your dream last night. It's a desperate attempt at communication that's usually ineffective.

Oh, you saw me at a red light? Cool! Let's get back together.

If you're over your ex, you won't make unnecessary attempts to reach out because you don't yearn to connect with them anymore. (And at some point, you might even forget what kind of car they drove.)

4. You Won't Go Out Of Your Way To Say Hi If You See Them

When we are truly over someone, we are fine leaving them in the past where they belong.

The other day, I walked past my ex at a coffee shop. He was sitting on the patio doing work on his laptop, and I walked right past him on my way to the 7-Eleven to get toilet paper. (Yes, I am fancy!) The thing is this, he did not look up from his laptop, and I did not stop to get his attention to say hi.

We're strangers now, unattached, going about our individual lives, and living freely. There's no need for me to distract him from his work, and there's no need for him to distract me from my very important errand of getting toilet paper at my local 7-Eleven.

Plus, when you're over someone, you kind of don't really want to see them. It's not a hatred thing, but you could really take or leave their involvement in your life. And in that moment, I left my ex sitting on the patio of a coffee shop — alone.

5. Songs Won't Remind You Of Them

You know that feeling when you're fresh out of a breakup, and you can hardly listen to the radio because every song reminds you of the person who broke your heart? It doesn't matter if it's hip hop or country — it doesn't even matter what the lyrics say. Every sound that comes out of your speakers makes you think about all the good times you had with your ex, and how they're not in your life any longer.

However, once your heart has been mended, music is no longer your worst enemy. Adele doesn't make you cry, and you can delete some of the Spotify mixes you made when you were feeling extra emo.

A good litmus test to see if you are over your ex is to listen to Gotye's "Somebody That I Used to Know." If it doesn't remind you of anyone, then your heart is officially free.

6. You Can Love Someone New


When you're finally over someone old, you'll actually be able to love someone new. Your actions won't be based off spite or trying to make your ex jealous. You won't be rebounding, wallowing, or trying to replace and get over your past with someone new.

Once you've moved on, grown, and learned the necessary lessons from your previous breakup, you'll be ready for a fresh relationship with someone new. When your new relationship isn't an extension of your past ones, then you've finally moved on.

If you recognize any of these emotions, then most likely, you are over your ex. Congratulations. It's not easy to do.

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