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Ways To Get Out Of A Sexual Rut And Start Having Better Sex

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Sexual ruts are real, and they are a literal buzzkill, damn it.

Depending your situation, your rut might manifest as the same ol' same ol' kind of sex over and over again, or blow in like a dry spell, where you aren't having any sex at all!

The first thing to do is NOT settle or get complacent. Even though you might not feel a massive VOID of great sex in your life, that doesn't mean the void doesn't exist.

Take your personal pleasure seriously and like with any diet rut, sleep rut, professional rut or creative rut, get proactive about finding great sex again.

Here are some ideas to help push you in the right direction.

Switch up your daily routine.

If every day looks the same, try to find ways to sneak in sexy activities, even if they are solo adventures.

Taking a yoga class, reading a book at a dim bar or switching from wine to whiskey are all ways to tap into your sexuality. You'll encourage some serious goddess mojo by having control and independence over your body and doing things that, literally, feel good.

Plus, you'll get to feel like a character Scarlett Johansson would probably play in a movie, which always helps me.

Adding something new to your routine will shake off any cobwebs hanging around your life in general and hopefully evoke some new energy.

Go for something (or someone) you would never go for.

And yes, I sure do mean in between the sheets.

If you're single, hit the town with your lady friends and try this experiment: Hit on or approach guys you would normally never go for. Even if it doesn't end up with a romp in bed, just stretching your flirting muscles and getting creative with attraction can unlock dormant sexual thoughts or attitudes.

You'll be reminded you are an attractive, sexual being and not confined to whatever standards you previously subscribed to (be it the kinds of guys you dated OR the role you played in a courtship).

If you're shacked up, I bet you can guess what I'm going to say...

TRY A NEW POSITION. YUP. DUH. And it's OK if you don't go totally crazy.

Just stretching your flirting muscles and getting creative with attraction can unlock dormant sexual thoughts.

If you're normally on top, try the bottom. If you're normally in front, try the back. If you're normally lights off, try having the lights on.

Even small changes will shine light on new erogenous zones.

Listen to your friends.

Listen, everybody loves sex. If you need some advice on what's working and what isn't for other people, talk to your friends about it.

A good gal-pal brunch never disappoints when it comes to sharing great tips and tricks. Plus, hearing what other people do that gets their rocks off helps normalize anything you might be intimated by or usually feels taboo to you, and it reminds you that there isn't any one right or wrong way to have sex.

Take notes and make it your homework to try their ideas!

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Try a new look.

Hate to say it, hate to admit it, but a lot of how we feel inside might reflect how we look outside, and if switching up your physical look boosts your inner confidence, then I say go for it.

Try adding traditionally sexy fashion features like lace or leather to your outfits, and see how quickly you transform into a dominatrix.

As a way to step into a new sexy mindset, try playing with a bold lipstick, rock a mysterious deep side part or add pizazz with big, long, fake eyelashes.

Of course, if these things don't reflect your own definition of sexy, do whatever feels provocative to you!

Role playing with yourself like this might just be the key you need to role playing in bed.

Get your blood pumping.

I'm never a fan of advertising exercise because, let's be real, I hate exercise. But getting your blood pumping and the sweat flowing is an awesome way to boost libido and keep you connected to your body.

Just a few minutes on the treadmill or even some light stretching might have you looking in the mirror thinking, "Damn, I'm feeling myself," which is sure to naturally boost sex appeal and confidence.

Think of getting physical in the gym as foreplay to getting physical in bed.

Sleep, baby, sleep.

One of your libido's natural enemies is exhaustion. Feeling fatigued, worn down and sleepy is, literally, the exact opposite of feeling horny, energized and rowdy.

Making sure you get a solid seven to eight hours of sleep (plus a solid seven to eight glasses of water, probably) is an awesome way to keep yourself energized and ready to go when the mood strikes. And it WILL if you follow this advice.

Beauty rest is a real thing, and catching enough zzz's ensures you'll have the energy you need to keep the good times rolling.

Eat, pray, love a little.

Listen, girl. Go find yourself, and once you've found yourself, come back and have some wild sex.

No one will knock you for taking time to go on a solo adventure and work through any other mental or emotional blocks you're dealing with that are keeping your sexual needs and desires at bay.

It's hard to feel in the mood if you're hanging onto deeper, heavier baggage. Try identifying what's keeping you (and your sex drive) down, and take the time you need to tackle that.

Once you do, you bet your bottom dollar you'll emerge a shiny, sexual butterfly.

The main name of the game is take care of yourself, and don't be afraid to get a little crazy. It only takes a few small tweaks to unleash your inner Venus and Aphrodite.