There isn't a perfect formula that can tell you how long to date before becoming exclusive with someone. For some couples, it feels right to define the relationship immediately, while others prefer to date casually for a few weeks or even months before committing to exclusivity. Other factors — such as timing and distance — can also affect how soon two people decide to see each other exclusively. So if you’re wondering how many dates before relationships become official, a right answer unfortunately do not exist.
It may be tempting to get to this point in a relationship as quickly as possible, but Alessandra Conti, celebrity matchmaker at Matchmakers in the City, previously told Elite Daily you shouldn’t rush to become official with someone. “The goal is to be exclusive with the right person,” she said. “The best way to truly learn about another person is to take the time needed to truly get to know them before making a commitment to them.” And while there’s no exact right amount of time, she says you should wait anywhere from one to three months before making the relationship exclusive. It’s also possible that — after three months of dating — you’re still not ready to DTR, and that’s OK, too.
If you’re prioritizing yourself at the moment or still excited by the prospect of dating other people, then don’t feel obligated to settle down after a certain number of dates. As Samantha Burns, relationship coach and author of Breaking Up & Bouncing Back, previously told Elite Daily, becoming official shouldn’t feel like an obligation. “If you’re enjoying yourself and having a blast doing ‘me time’, then by all means stay single and keep investing in yourself," she said. “Ask yourself what’s missing [from that one person], and what you’re hoping to find in someone else."
I spoke to six people in exclusive relationships about how long you should date before becoming official, and here’s what they had to say.
Exclusivity isn't as complicated a concept as it's often made out to be. As long as you and your partner are on the same page about what you want out of the relationship, you might even choose to skip the labels all together — and that's totally cool, too.