What has two nipples, a bush straight out of the '70s and doesn't care what you think? The answer, surprisingly, is not a person -- it's a dress.
This has been the year of the “naked” dress, the nickname given to a style that's predominately sheer in order to show off the wearer's toned body. Jennifer Lopez, Beyoncé and Kim Kardashian all love the “naked” gown for its ability to bare their curves while remaining socially acceptable. Mostly.
But now, there's a new stripped-down number in town, worn by a largely unknown face. At the garden party of London's famously posh Serpentine Galleries on July 6, an actress named Meredith Ostrom wore a nude, sequined dress embellished with a naked female silhouette -- pink nipples, pubic hair and all. Notably, the dress even comes with a much-coveted thigh gap.
Wondering where you would even buy a gown like this one? It's the brainchild of pop-art label The Rodnik Band and has actually already had its 15 minutes of fame in bizarre style roundups as far back as 2011.
The brand's aesthetic is something like “Katy Perry chic,” in that it also sells ballgowns shaped like oversized fish and cartoon hams. Notably, designer and artist Philip Colbert counts stars like Cara Delevingne, Rita Ora and Lady Gaga among his fans.
If you don't have any luxe garden parties on your social calendar, I have some suggestions for where this cocktail number might be appropriate. Instead of wearing an oversize T-shirt to hide your body at the next beach weekend, pack this extra-naked dress and show off your body instead of showing off your body. It's like an expensive, glittery way to tell everyone "I'm insecure but here's my dream body!"
If faux pubes aren't dramatic enough for you, try copying the woman who made her own dress from real pubic hair. No? Anyone?