It's no secret that eventually, relationships (even healthy, happy ones) tend to cool down in the romance department. And yet, when your partner stops being romantic, it can still catch you off guard and feel like a bit of a blow. Just know you're not alone. "Despite what we want to believe, relationships take work, even the best ones," dating coach Erika Ettin tells Elite Daily. "One of the first things to go is the art of the romantic gesture. Why? Because people get comfortable. That's not inherently a bad thing at all. The comfortable phase of a relationship is wonderful. But it's also a time when you may take your partner for granted and vice versa," she explains.
If your partner seems to be slacking in the romance department recently, Connell Barrett, a New York City dating coach and founder and executive coach at Dating Transformation, tells Elite Daily to blame evolution. "It’s how we’re wired," she says, and if romance early on feels more effortless, that's because it is. "That’s because we’re in a natural state of what researchers call 'passionate love,' which typically lasts 12 to 24 months,” he explains. “But as humans, we’re wired to move into 'compassionate love' — still wonderful, but less intense and less romantic. This happens because we adapt to new experiences and they feel less new, less exciting. To our brains, the novel becomes routine. We start to take romance for granted because it literally feels less exciting and exotic."
While all relationships inevitably ebb and flow, just because yours has hit an ebb doesn't mean that the romance is dead forever. In fact, your best bet to get things back on track and rekindle the romantic spark is to get proactive about it. Here's what the experts suggest.