If you've ever spent an evening swiping through dating apps or wading through the bar scene, you know one incontrovertible truth: You can recognize that someone is attractive and still not be, well, attracted to them. What attracts you to a person is a complex web of personal preferences. It's totally normal to be drawn to certain people more than others. If your body, heart, and soul didn't help you filter out people you weren't that into, you'd basically be drowning in suitors. (Not that that's a problem. I mean, that sounds like The Bachelorette — not exactly a raw deal.)
My boyfriend Saul and I met on Tinder (when I interviewed him for this story), and I thought he was cute from the moment I swiped right. But it wasn't until we met up for drinks the next week that those little fireworks started going off in my brain. He had dark hair, dark eyes to match, and was perfectly dressed in a black cashmere sweater. Less than a minute after I slid onto the barstool, he had me cracking up. I remember thinking, "Oh, damn, I like this person."
That "Wait a sec, feelings?!" moment is different for everyone, so I asked around. I spoke to 11 women about what first attracted them to their partners, and their responses gave me butterflies all over again. Are you sitting down? Because you should get ready to swoon.