Let's be real: You probably use your phone a lot throughout the day. Perhaps constantly. So, it's really no wonder that you'd want to see your partner's smiling face looking back at you as you check your Postmates order or brainstorm ways to reply to your overbearing grandmother's text about your last Instagram post. But should you change your phone background to a pic of your boo? If you currently see your partner everyday or if you'd like to see them everyday — setting your boo as your phone background can be like the digital version of wearing a locket with their picture around your neck. If you have an abundance of cute couple pictures or hundreds of solo shots of them looking like a snack, you may wonder when it's appropriate to set a picture of your boo as your background.
"There are no steadfast rules about the length of time before your S.O. becomes your screensaver or background photo," Clarissa Silva, behavioral scientist and creator of Your Happiness Hypothesis Method, tells Elite Daily. "The real driver of the behavior is feeling that close to someone to have a constant reminder of them each time you look at your phone. Some couples enjoy this when they are apart, are in a LDR, or they are confident in their relationship."
If you want a constant reminder of your love for your partner, setting them as your phone background may be a cute way to see your partner throughout the day without really *seeing* them throughout the day. However, if you've been on literally one date or if you haven't yet DTR, you may want to check in with your new boo before hitting "save" on their photo.
"The person you're dating is going to see your phone — you don't want them to be shocked by suddenly seeing their face," NYC relationship expert Susan Winter says. "Wait until your relationship is established and the two of you have hammered out the fact that you're a couple." Of course, "establishing a relationship" looks different for everyone. There's no one rule about what your relationship should look like before you make your boo your phone background, but it's important to factor in how your partner will feel about this gesture. If you're feeling unsure about how your boo will respond if you make them your background, it may be helpful to talk to them about where you're both at.
If you're thinking of setting your boo as your background, you may be wondering: Should I ask them first?. While consent is key and it's always important to check in with a boo, if you know your boo would respond well to the change, experts attest that switching your phone background to a pic of them could actually be a sweet surprise. "Many couples do it as a surprise to their partners and their partners are usually flattered," Silva says.
If you've been seeing your boo for a while, something like changing your phone background to a picture of them can be a cute small gesture to demonstrate how much you care about them. "It's your phone and you may do as you like," Winter says. "Your mate should feel honored that you've chosen their image to be your screen saver." Saving your boo as your screen saver can also be a can be a sweet nod that your feelings are becoming more serious. "Some couples want their SO to feature them on the screes to demonstrate their commitment. Others feel having your SO on your screen is a cheating deterrent," Silva says.
Of course, when it comes to choosing a picture, deciding between a pic of you both and a snap of just them can be another consideration. "For some, it can be a picture of both of them at their favorite location because they want to be reminded of that moment in their lives — but for others, it’s just their S.O. because they feel that particular photo is the hottest representation of their partner," Silva says. If you have an absolute favorite photo of your boo eating a corndog at the state fair or if you love a picture of them as a little kid during a soccer game, making that your phone background may be a no-brainer. According to Silva, it's not so much the subject of the literal photo, but the impression that the pic leaves. "Deciding about a solo or couple photo as your screensaver is a very personal decision," Silva says. "It’s more about what you are made to feel every time you look at the photo rather than the actual photo."
If you have a photo of your boo that makes you happy when you see it, and you know they'd enjoy being your homepage, it's OK to set a picture of your boo as your phone background. While you may want to check in with your boo to make sure they would be comfortable being featured on your lock-screen, if you're in an established relationship (whatever that means to you) it may be fun to surprise your boo with a couples-pic. If you're still feeling unsure about whether or not you and your boo are ready to take this step, talk to them in person before hitting "save." Remember: You get to choose your phone background, and you get to choose what timing works for you.