If Your Date Ignores Your Text After A Date, Do You Text Again? Here’s What Experts Say
Double texting is one of those things you do with your friends without hesitation, but when it comes to someone you're romantically interested in, you may be a little more skeptical. You might not want to seem too eager in the beginning, but if the first few dates have gone really well, and you are eager to continue getting to know them, it might be hard to resist reaching out again. But what if you text them, and for some reason, they don't answer? If your date ignores your text after a date, do you text again? The short answer is yes, but not immediately.
"If a date doesn’t text right back, you should wait," Dawn Maslar, author of Men Chase, Women Choose, tells Elite Daily. "You never know what’s going on in a person’s life. Maybe they had a last-minute trip and are on airplane mode." It can be easy to just assume the worst in people — especially when you first meet someone and are trying to protect your heart. But sometimes, things really do just come up that can keep someone from replying to your text in a prompt manner. It happens. "If you don’t hear from him/her within a day or two, you can follow up with another text," Maslar says. "Something like, 'Just following up on my last text,' or 'How are you doing?'"
Life coach Nina Rubin, agrees, but goes a step further to specify what you should consider before texting your date again. "Send a second text if you had a great time on the first date, and you have 80 percent certainty your date did, too," she tells Elite Daily. "How can you quantify? Be honest with yourself. Did it seem like you both were 'vibing' on the same level? Did you both laugh? Was there mention of a second date? If the answers are no, don’t send. If the answers are yes, with more certainty than insecurity, consider texting [again]."
Rubin recommends waiting a couple days and then following up saying that you sent a text a few days before but weren't sure if they got it. Add something like, "I’d love to take you out again. Are you available on Thursday at 6 for happy hour at the new spot near your work?" she advises. By providing a specific date and time to see each other again, it makes it easy for your date to tell you yes or no. "If they don’t write back, let it go," she says. "Do not send a nasty message. Don’t shame them. Walk away."
Maslar also suggests calling if they don't reply to your first text. "Say something like, 'Texting is so impersonal, so I thought I’d call,'" she says. "If they don’t respond to the second text or answer the phone, the next move is theirs. Yes, it may be frustrating and possibly even rude, but keep yourself busy and give them the room to come back when they can." She points out that the dating period is a preview of how it would be to date you. "If you are demanding or seem desperate, it will push people away." So, if you've already done your part by reaching out twice, the ball is now on your date's court.
If ghosting your goddess self is their way of telling you they're not interested, then you deserve better anyway. "Fishing for a response will probably still not get you the directness that you are looking for," Pella Weisman, licensed psychotherapist and dating coach, tells Elite Daily. "Take their lack of communication as an answer. It may not be the one you want to hear, but it is an answer nonetheless." You tried, but there's only so much you can do. Always remember: If someone doesn't want to continue seeing you, that's their loss, not yours. Thank u, next.