If You & Your Partner Always Watch Netflix Before Bed, Here's How To Squeeze In Sex
Listen, it's pretty obvious that all the romantic comedies you watched as a pre-teen (and still watch, no shame!) have all lied about the reality of relationships. You don't always magically fall asleep in your partner's arms, and there isn't always time for date nights and makeout sessions on the couch in your perfectly clean living room. It's just not realistic, because real life can be messy, hectic, and stressful. So don't worry if you're not constantly having sex or cuddling in bed. There are ways you can figure out how to squeeze in sex, even if you and your partner always fall asleep to Netflix or are too tired after catching up on Game of Thrones.
While "a lot of people do watch TV then fall asleep," Sarah Watson, licensed professional counselor and sex therapist, tells Elite Daily, there are certainly issues that this routine can bring up. "This is not a great habit to get into. I would question the couple if this habit is bringing them closer together." Of course, not everything you do has to bring you and your partner closer together, and after a long day, falling asleep with an episode of The Office playing in the background might sound amazing. But what happens when it feels like your sex life is taking a backseat to your TV screen?
The good news is, it is very possible and not all that hard to put the spark back into your pre-bedtime sexy time. Sure, you might have fallen into the habit of curling up with bae and dozing off to Netflix, but that doesn't mean you have to do it every night. Watson says it's time to change it up! She says "you don't need to completely abandon Netflix, but you might consider your routine in the evening," she advises. By all means, watch an episode or two at night, but try to set a new boundary with your partner about how long to watch TV and give yourselves a time limit.
"Carve out time for each other without screens," she says. "You can decide what time that is going to be but start a new habit. This can be difficult, try it for 21 days and see what happens." Challenge yourself and your partner to focus on each other, as Watson advises, and you might just be able to enjoy sex even more, and more often.
If you're worried about telling your partner you want to cut back on the screen time, then take a deep breath. "Sharing with your partner how it is making you feel, disconnected, sad, unsure, frustrated" is important, Watson says, and honesty can ensure that both of your needs are being met. "Explore what does make you both feel a closer connection together and figure out what is getting in the way, and make a plan to change it," she continues. "This is something that can easily be resolved, it just takes some communication and effort." You've got this!