Even for the most seasoned daters out there, a virtual date means all bets are off. Is anyone wearing pants? Without a check to sign at the end of the night, how can you tell when the date ends? Is your heart racing from actual chemistry, or are you just panicking because your WiFi keeps cutting out? The answer to all of these questions and more: Who! Knows! Amid the confusion, each zodiac sign's FaceTime date behavior is weirdly specific.
If you're skeptical that a millennia-old astrological system can accurately predict how folks handle such a newfangled invention, don't be: Humans have had to deal with flirting and feelings forever. Adding in a screen doesn't really change much. For some signs (ahem, Leo), the virtual medium only amplifies their true selves. Scorpio and Gemini won't be deterred by the limitations of a digital date — they'll just barrel on being exactly who they are (as they should!). Capricorn's nervous energy around the strangeness of a FaceTime date will translate into an adorably nerdy vibe only they can truly pull off. And if you thought a Taurus or a Cancer would want to leave their house anyway, well, there's a lot you need to learn.
Here's how each sign handles the strange quirks of a virtual meetup:
This impulsive fire sign has never been good at restraint. If you have plans to meet on FaceTime at 7:00 p.m., they'll dial you at 6:37 because they were too excited to wait. (And if they really like you? Expect a spontaneous call whenever they miss the sound of your voice. Which will be often.)
The camera might be trained on their face, but just off-screen, Taurus is completely surrounded by snacks and drinks. They brought a bowl of popcorn, three packs of Gummi Worms, a slice of pizza, a White Claw, and half of their leftover iced coffee — you know, just the essentials.
After 20 minutes of rapid-fire banter and swapping killer band recs, this air sign realizes — oops — they have to go. They forgot they had two other FaceTime dates lined up for the same night. Don't take this one personally. Geminis are social creatures!
Cancers are homebodies who take pride in decorating their digs to reflect exactly who they are. A FaceTime date is right up their alley; no need to leave the house! They'll be excited to offer a tour of their space.
Do you think nobody ever looks that great on FaceTime? Clearly, you've never dated a Leo. "Extra" is this fire sign's middle name, and yes, they have a ring light perfectly positioned for maximum glow.
While other signs might roll up in pajamas — or the iconic video-chat combo of a cute top and no pants — Virgo is dressed to the nines. Why? A FaceTime date is still a date, and there's nothing that turns on a Virgo more than following rules of decorum.
Libras are charming as heck, even through a screen. They'll Venmo their boo a few bucks to cover the cost of their drink, or send over Chinese takeout so you can virtually share a meal together. Who said romance was dead?
Look, stereotypes exist for a reason. I'm not saying a Scorpio can't have a perfectly lovely conversation — they can. But they can also make dirty jokes and tempting innuendos better than anyone else on the planet. For a Scorpio, the line between a FaceTime date and FaceTime sex is pretty thin... so be prepared.
The adventurers of the zodiac probably won't be satisfied by just a FaceTime date, no matter how riveting the conversation. So don't be surprised if you spend half the call dreaming up the places you'll explore together the next time you have face time — not FaceTime.
This no-nonsense earth sign has already rigged a makeshift phone stand using three books, a mason jar, and a rubber band. Dates are nerve-wracking enough without the fear of being filmed at a weird angle; Capricorns feel way calmer when they're perfectly in control.
Don't be surprised if a Pisces answers your FaceTime call from the bathtub. This water sign might be too comfortable soaking to bother toweling off, or they might think they look extra luxurious and sexy in a bubble bath. Either way, they're probably right.