Before Sending A Nude, Ask Yourself These 5 Questions
There's nothing like an impromptu self-timer selfie shoot to make you feel like an actual Hadid sister. From changing the lighting to trying out different positions, a lot of factors can go into taking the perfect photo. Of course, if you're thinking about baring it all before the camera and letting your partner see for themselves, there are even more things to consider before sending a nude.
"Being honest and having open communication are two very important things to keep in mind when sending nudes," Amy Boyajian, CEO of Wild Flower, tells Elite Daily. "Sending nudes can be extremely helpful to stay sexually connected, as well as adding variety and excitement to your routine."
If you and your boo are long-distance, or if you just like to connect intimately during the day, swapping sensual snaps can help keep the heat going when you're not physically together. But no matter how comfortable you are with being naked on camera, sending a nude demands some serious pre-thought. Although a naked photoshoot could be just what the ~love doctor~ ordered, there are some major things to unpack before hitting send.
If you're feeling ready to undress onscreen — here are five questions to ask yourself first.
1. Do *I* Want To Be Doing This?
Like any type of sexual encounter, sending someone nudes demands consent and boundaries. Before you hit send, ask yourself if sending nudes is something you and the recipient are both into. "First of all, make sure you trust the person beforehand and you’ve had a clear discussion of consent and boundaries," Boyajian says. "Remember, consent can be taken away at any time, even after you’ve sent the picture."
It's important to check-in with yourself and your comfort levels every time you send a nude. If you were super into sending nudes but it no longer does it for you, or if you originally felt comfortable with your partner saving your pics but now want them erased, consent and boundaries can (and do!) change over time.
2. Do I Trust The Recipient?
At the risk of sounding like a high school guidance counselor, remember: When you send someone a naked picture, they can do whatever they want with it.
"It’s important to make sure that you trust the person beforehand and have had a clear discussion about your comfort levels and consent," Boyajian says. It is possible for someone to save these pictures on any platform; be aware of this and let them know if you’re comfortable with that or not."
Although sending nudes can be a super sexy way to connect with people, it's important to make sure you trust whoever you're sending them to. If you and your partner are OK with sharing each other's nudes or if you've both agreed to delete after sending, make sure you trust them to follow through.
3. Am I Excited To Explore Sending Nudes, Or Is There Something Else I’d Be More Into?
If you haven't sent nudes before and you're not sure how you feel about it, Lola Jean, sex educator and mental health professional, suggests asking yourself what attracts you to the idea of sending nudes, and to explore the ways that sending them can give you pleasure.
"If nudes are something you seek or enjoy sending, try explaining why it is that you enjoy them," Jeans says. "On the flip side if you don’t enjoy receiving or sending nudes, try asking or explaining why [you do] not like it." Jean suggests asking yourself if there's something you or your partner could do or add to the photos to make sending nudes more enjoyable.
Ultimately, if you're not into sending nudes, you never need to feel the pressure to do it. But if you don't know how you feel and you're open to trying it, getting clear on your turn-ons can help you and your partner(s) truly enjoy the experience.
4. What Makes Me Feel Sexy? What Even Is Sexy To Me?
Although sending nudes demands a lot of trust and consent, taking nudes can be a great way to connect with yourself. "The act of taking nudes can be a new way to explore new parts of your own sexuality," says Boyajian. "There’s something thrilling about being able to capture your own definition of sexy on camera. The right camera angle can make a big difference in making you feel comfortable."
Boyajian suggests asking yourself what makes you feel sexy or what your favorite parts of your body are, before getting in front of the camera. Capturing yourself in a way that makes you feel sexy and confident can be an invigorating practice. Before you hit send, ask yourself how you want the shot to look and how you want to capture it. Using a self-timer or a tripod can help you capture the frame without your hands, and trying different poses or facial expressions can be half the fun.
5. Why Am I Sending This? Does The Recipient Want This?
When everyone involved is into it, sending nudes can be a sexy way to connect. Yet, before diving butt-first into someone's inbox (literally), it's important to ask yourself why you're sending a nude and if the recipient is willing and ready for it.
"For a lot of people the idea of sending a nude picture of themselves is that someone on the other end is seeing it. Hello, unsolicited d*ck pick motivation," Jean says, "It may have nothing to do with the angle of what happens after the nude, just that someone is viewing it."
If you and your boo are super into sending nudes, capturing your rockin' bods over the phone may get you both going. Yet, it's imperative to make sure everyone is comfortable and ready for it. What are your motivations? Did you ask them if it's OK? As long as everything's consensual, there's no wrong or right way to get frisky. Checking in with your own intentions and your partner's comfort level might help you find clarity and comfort with your own sexuality.
Sending a nude can be a sexy, silly way to interact with your partner(s). And although experimenting and exploring can be fun, you never need to do something you're not into. All that matters is you and your partner's consent and comfort — and that's the naked truth.