“If you love soft, then you've already lost / But oh, if you love hard, you should let down your guard / And follow your heart.” Those lyrics from WZRD featuring Kid Cudi sum up what it means to be all in when it comes to romance. Some people are simply more susceptive to this pure, potent, unfiltered kind of love, and the Myers-Briggs personality types who love the hardest are the ones who tend to have some of the most passionate relationships.
This kind of all-consuming love isn’t for everyone, however, especially because it can leave you feeling emotionally exposed. But on the plus side, embracing that feeling of vulnerability with reckless abandon can allow you to find a deeper level of intimacy. So, what does it mean to love hard? For one, when you commit to someone, you give 150% of your effort to building a strong foundation. You’re more than willing to work through problems — in fact, you’ll do whatever it takes to try and smooth things over before walking away. You also may have a hard time letting go of those you love, because you pour so much of yourself into your relationships.
Knowing whether you or your boo is the type to love hard can be valuable insight, so here are a few of the Myers-Briggs personality types that typically take an all-or-nothing approach to dating.
Deep down, an INFJ is looking for their soulmate. So, they’re only interested in pursuing relationships that are built to last, and that show potential for a meaningful connection.
But The Advocate definitely doesn’t fall quickly or easily — it takes them some time to trust someone enough to let their guard down. That said, once they feel secure, they become immensely generous with their devotion, and give their all to the relationship in every respect. That’s why it can be so difficult for them to move on after a relationship has ended.
INFJs are also givers by nature, and they’ll stop at nothing to ensure their partner feels appreciated, loved, and cared for.
Unlike INFJs, ENFPs don’t hesitate before jumping headfirst into romance. In fact, some might think they fall too fast. But that’s just how these spontaneous, spirited individuals do when it comes to love. And there's nothing wrong with that; they just need to date people who can match their enthusiasm and intensity.
The Campaigner approaches everything with gusto, and that includes dating. So, needless to say, a relationship with an ENFP hardly ever lacks passion.
The Protagonist invests a heck of a lot into their relationships. As extroverted feelers, they thrive off figuring out what their SO needs by expertly picking up on emotional cues, and providing it in any way they can.
ENFJs are known for searching for the goodness in others, and for being able to summon a powerful level of compassion, which means that even when their partner falls short, their acceptance and love is still unwavering. Expressive, nurturing, and supportive, ENFJs love hard because it’s the only way they know how.
If there’s one word that accurately captures an ESFJ’s relationship strength, it’s dedication. There’s nothing that The Consul isn’t willing to do for their loved ones, and they tend to mesh best with other personalities who are just as giving. As long as an ESFJ feel like their actions are appreciated by their partner, they’ll bend over backward for them.
BTW, the ESFJ is the epitome of an extrovert, and they have no qualms about publicly declaring their love. So, when an ESFJ has fallen hard, you’ll know, because their IG feed will become peppered with #couplegoals posts.