Disagreements are inevitable in relationships, and each partner's conflict style can definitely come into play not only in terms of how well they're able to communicate and resolve issues but also how compatible they are. While some people dodge conflict at all costs, others not only accept it but actually take the initiative to instigate it if a problem is brewing under the surface. It's not that these confrontational Myers-Briggs personality types want to pick a fight — it's that they have no patience for letting things fester. And in general, that's a good thing.
This is especially true if one partner is more conflict-avoidant. Those non-confrontational types may prefer to sweep things under the rug, but when that's the tendency for both people in the relationship, then issues can go unresolved, and resentment can build. Having one partner who's able to address something head-on ensures that disagreements, differences, disappointments, and other tensions are tackled before they turn into something worse.
So, which personality traits make someone more confrontational? Extraversion is generally associated with assertiveness, although that doesn't mean that Introverts can't be confrontational in their own way, too. And while Feelers are more likely to focus on the emotions of the people involved, Thinkers are more likely to focus on the facts, which sometimes makes it easier for them to confront someone.
One thing's for sure: If you find yourself in a relationship with any of the following personality types, you can rest assured that there will be no guessing games because they'll always keep it real AF with you.
Honest and practical, the Executive has a strong sense of right and wrong and enjoys creating an order. So, if they feel a sense of disorganization in your relationship, or something is happening that goes against their personal morals or values, they’ll definitely have no problem confronting you about it. ESTJs are known for their strong leadership skills, and they will often take the reins where conflict is concerned, so as long as you don’t mind them directing the conversation, you may appreciate their decisiveness and clear guidance.
What’s more — the ESTJ has a remarkable way of staying level-headed during conflicts, so you don’t typically have to worry about them lashing out. They’re decisive, quick thinkers who are mostly concerned with efficiency, so if you need some time to think or process something, you may need to remind them of that (because they’ll be eager to resolve things). But guess what? You'll never have to wonder if something is bothering them because they won't hesitate to bring it to your attention.
Both self-confident and strong-willed, ENTJs have no problem making their opinions, thoughts, and gripes known. Plus, they love a challenge, so if they suspect that trouble is brewing in their relationship, they’ll waste no time diving right in, and using their boundless energy and logical mindset to examine every angle and figure out the best way to move forward.
During a confrontation, they tend to focus on facts rather than feelings (like a true Thinker). ENTJs can be a tad stubborn, and sometimes it’s difficult for them to accept ideas or approaches outside of their own. That said, since a Commander is in it to win it when it comes to their relationships, they will almost always take responsibility for how conflict plays out and do whatever they can to make sure something is resolved in a way that’s mutually satisfying. As long as they can develop a certain degree of sensitivity to the partner’s feelings, their forthcoming nature and strategic thinking can make confrontations productive AF.
The ISTJ may seem reserved and soft-spoken, but they definitely don’t shy away from confrontation. They also rarely lose their temper, and their ability to remain super calm from start to finish during a confrontation ensures that things don’t escalate unnecessarily. Not only can they keep their feet on the ground, but they never play mind games. Instead, the Logistician prefers to get to the point and come up with a plan of action as quickly as possible.
Honesty is of the utmost importance to the ISTJ, and sometimes they can come across as overly blunt. But that’s simply because, to the Logistician, the most effective way to solve a problem is to lay out all the facts without holding back.
You can be sure that if an ISTJ confronts you, they’re not doing so hastily. This personality type never makes assumptions, because they spend so much time analyzing a situation on their own before presenting it to you for discussion. While the Logistician loves to be right, they have no problem whatsoever owning their mistakes, which is a phenomenal quality to have during a confrontation.
If there’s one thing you’ll immediately notice about the ESTP, it’s that they bring dynamic energy to everything they do. And they’ll bring that same energy to confrontations, where they’ll leverage their ability to assess a problem and propose practical solutions quickly.
But where the Entrepreneur truly shines is their perceptiveness. They have an uncanny ability to notice small shifts, which means they can instantly tell when something is bothering you, but you aren’t addressing it. Once they’ve observed these slight changes, they’ll likely confront you with some questions. For those who have trouble voicing their concerns and feelings, being called out in this way can be a blessing or a curse. But at least you won’t ever have to worry that your ESTP partner is missing all the signs that something has upset you.
Since ESTPs are Sensors and Thinkers, they think rationally and like to focus on the here and now, and both of those traits will factor in during a confrontation. During a conflict, you can expect an ESTP to honestly express their thoughts, carefully consider all the details of the situation, and remain as objective as possible.
