15 Real Struggles Of Being A 20-Something That'll Make You Tag Your BFF
Only 20-somethings can understand some struggles that are so real. These are the times when you're learning how to "adult," but still feel like a kid. You're waking up in the morning, and complaining about the traffic on your commute to campus or work. But, then you're roaming around the candy aisles of the grocery store and contemplating if gummy worms would be good for dinner. Yes, it's a weird time when you're expecting the worst, but hoping for the best. The real struggles of being a 20-something will make you tag your bestie, and say, "Same."
Seriously, are any of us in our 20s even qualified to be adults? You likely tag your bestie in memes and hilarious tweets all the time, from people who are facing the same situations as you. They're putting the wrong soap in their dishwasher, and attempting to navigate the real world. Don't get me wrong: It's so much easier said than done, and making mistakes only leads to the best stories.
Everything that you knew is changing — some for better and others for worse. What you're left with, though, is your life. You're creating it one step at a time, even if it feels like you're headed in the wrong direction. Just take a deep breath, and hold on tight. These 15 struggles can be the worst, but they're not impossible to handle. Plus, your bestie will be standing there with a bucket of ice cream and bottle of wine on the really tough days.
1. Finding Your Soulmate
The search for your soulmate can be exhausting. You're wandering all over town or even the world, and kissing some frogs along the way. Don't even get me started on navigating dating apps or picking out the right photos you like for your profile. That's a whole different ball game that somehow makes the process a lot more complicated.
My advice to you: Keep living your life, and the universe will likely give you exactly what you were looking for. Sometimes you have to stop searching, and let that dreamy relationship come to you.
2. Disconnecting From Fake (Or Toxic) Friends
Some friendships weren't meant to last forever. That's OK. When you realize someone has become a toxic addition to your life, it's time to go your separate ways. This situation may not be easy to handle, which is why a lot of 20-somethings would consider it a struggle.
You have to stand up for yourself and do what's best for you. Hopefully, facing your fake friends won't come with much confrontation. But, if it does, be sure to go with your gut and make decisions that are healthy for both of you.
3. Dealing With Changes To Your Social Circle
On top of disconnecting from your fake friends, you're dealing with other changes to your social circle. You're graduating college and moving far away from your roommates, or watching your friends leave your hometown. It's not easy, mostly because you've never had this kind of long-distance relationship. Your crew will throw a bunch of going away parties, and reminisce about the memories and late-night drives to the diner. Don't worry — you'll see them again real soon.
4. Watching Your Friends Get Married
Some of your friends are single and ready to mingle, while others are getting married and starting a family. It's a weird limbo that makes you wonder where you should be in your own love life. You'll be a bridesmaid for your bestie, and rent out a cute millennial pink Airbnb for her bachelorette party.
A few months later, you'll help her get ready and catching the bouquet. When you were little, you two dreamed about these moments, and now they're really happening. Somebody pass the cake (and some tissues), please!
5. Deciding Where To Live
You could travel all over the world, but where will you plant some roots? Deciding where to live is a serious struggle for many 20-somethings, just because it's such a milestone. On top of finding a place to call "home," you have to decide when you're going to move out. More often than not, the stars don't align and you have to push yourself to get out on your own.
6. Finding A Job That You Love
Every 20-something wants to make their passion a paycheck. But, that's always easier said than done. You have to commit to a lot of long nights and cups of coffee, and not be afraid to explore your options. At first, sending out a bunch job applications and getting rejected is going to be frustrating. Just know that a lot of other 20-somethings go through the same struggle, and you'll likely find a position that you love.
7. Staying Motivated Through School
Let's stop at motivation station. School has been a part of your life, for as long as you can remember. You may have thought about going to college when you were in high school, and explored some different majors. Or maybe you considered taking a year off to travel and then go back for your degree later on.
The path you choose is entirely up to you, but staying focused and passionate can be hard. You've found yourself procrastinating hard, and creating obstacles between you and your dreams.
8. Rallying When Your Friends Want To Go Out
You're not really sure when it happened, but you love staying in on a Saturday night. The group chat will start blowing up in the afternoon, and the excuses will start going through your head. Maybe you can say that you have work to do, or pretend you're asleep and never reply. Well, that could work, but rallying might be more fun.
You've caught yourself choosing the couch over a night out with the girls a lot, and aren't even mad about it. Alright, this time you'll go. But let's be home by midnight, OK?
9. Learning How To Save Money
Saving money is a struggle when you're a 20-something, because the bills seem to be endless. If you're living on your own, you have to consider your monthly rent check and cable expenses. Then there are also car expenses, student loans, and the items you bought on a bit of an impulse. You try so hard to stick to your budget, but ordering takeout sounds so good. Practice makes perfect on this one.
10. Making Time For Yourself
When you're in your 20s, it's hard to find time for yourself. Between school, work, and your other commitments, your planner fills up pretty fast. You're running to catch trains and flights, and rarely have a moment to calm down. All you want is a day where you can do a facial, get a mani and then not move from the couch.
Making space in your schedule is such a struggle, but also important. You can't do it all, especially if you're already feeling so exhausted. Find some balance, and know it's just part of being a 20-something.
11. Choosing Your Battles
Choosing your battles is an important lesson for a lot of 20-somethings. Your world is getting bigger, and you're going to run into people or places where you simply disagree. You'll try and fix problems that aren't your own, or insert yourself into someone else's business.
Some things are out of your control, like other people's happiness or the way they react to certain situations. You can try your best to create peace, understanding, and healthy conversation. But, some battles are not worth your time and energy. The struggle is figuring out which ones are actually worth the fight.
12. Keeping In Touch With Your Family
You're on the move when you're in your 20s. So, naturally, you may feel a bit separated from your family and what's going on back home. Maybe you found your own apartment, or are traveling all over the place. Keeping in touch can be difficult, but you're always trying to make it a priority. You want to be there for your younger siblings, and still hang out with your mom. Planning smaller visits, weekend trips, or even phone calls becomes essential.
13. Wanting To Be A Kid Again
Does time travel exist yet? You'd love to go back to the days of play dates and swapping chocolate chip cookies at lunch time. Those were simpler times when you could ask your mom to make all the big decisions. Sometimes, you'd pick out your own outfit or choose to step over every other stair (Phew! Glad you made it through that one.)
Being 20-something, you're constantly taking a walk down Nostalgia Lane and wondering if you're qualified for this whole #adulting thing. That's normal, and you can still make dinosaur-shaped nuggets for dinner.
14. Letting Go Of What Could've Been
The more you grow up, the more you realize that life rarely goes according to plan. You're likely not going to marry your crush from high school, or maybe won't get into the college of your dreams. It's hard not to dwell on those facts, and what could've been. One of the most important lessons you'll learn is to let go. You can't change the past, and isn't worth the constant struggle.
15. Coming Up With A "Plan"
Can everybody stop asking you about your life plan, now? Sure, some people are just genuinely curious or interested in what you're up to. But, you're getting tired of coming up with answers. You're stressed out and wondering when everything will start to make sense. Let's be honest: Right now, you're winging it and don't have much figured out. That's OK, as long as you're learning as you go. Nobody needs a plan for the future — just a good handle on the present.