Though by definition, having a "friend-crush" is a non-romantic feeling, I know from experience that having a crush on a friend is anything but platonic. Whether you just noticed that your coworker-turned-actual-friend is kind of hot or if you've always been in love with your bestie, you may be texting them a little more than usual. So, if you're looking for the best texts to send if you're crushing on a friend, look no further.
"Don’t try to keep a casual conversation going and going in the friend zone direction if what you really want is something more," relationship coach and texting expert Claudia Cox tells Elite Daily.
According to Cox, whether sparks are starting to fly with your pal or you're just feeling ready to shoot your shot (go you!), texting them may be a flirty way to connect when you're not literally together. And if you and your friend-crush already hang out all the time or you don't hang out that often but would like to, texting can be a great way to make some IRL plans. *Wink.*
Here are 13 texts to send your friend-crush. Oh wait, I mean, your crush that's also your friend.
1. "I really enjoy hanging out with you, it's been great getting to know you better."
When in doubt, it's always OK to text something that you would potentially still say if you didn't have a crush on your friend. Though that may not be the sexiest texting advice ever, if your friend is on the shyer side or you don't know how they feel, something flirty but not innately sexual (i.e., "I enjoy spending time with you") can be a sweet way to express your feelings without risking making anyone uncomfortable.
2. "Would you want to get dinner with me before going to *insert group activity*?"
Whether you've already confirmed that you and your crush are going to your friend's show tonight or the Lakers game tomorrow, try asking them for a one-on-one before or after an established group plan. Rather than completely asking them out, adding on to existing group plans can be a mellow way to express that you'd like some alone time.
3. "Are you free in a few weekends? I think we should get a group together and go camping!"
Going away with a pack of friends can be super fun, but it can also provide a romantic setting to turn up the heat with one friend in particular. Asking if your crush is free in the coming weeks and seeing if they would be interested in going on a group trip can be a casual way to gauge their interest in spending time with you.
Bonus: If you and your crush have always talked about going to Dollywood or you know they love the beach, try suggesting something that might pique their interest.
4. "Just saw *insert thing* and it made me think of you."
A concert, a piece of trash on the road that looked like Jerry Garcia, a small child trying on a tutu on the train; the options are endless. Everyone loves being thought about. If sending "thinking about you" seems a little intense, say that you saw something silly or sentimental and express why it made you think of them.
5. "You won't believe what happened to me today."
If you're trying to get the flirty texting ball rolling, sending something that calls for an answer can open up the conversation and make you both feel comfortable. Whether you end your story about your awful day with an invitation to grab a beer or coffee or you ask your friend to go with you to get your oil changed, talking about your day can help you make plans for your night.
6. "What was the name of that *insert thing* we were talking about the other day? I want to check it out."
Bringing up something your crush told you about or something you talked about in person can show your crush that you were paying attention to them and that you're thinking about them, even when they're not around. If they mentioned a shaved ice place or a local band they like, use this as a way to ask them out. Suggesting that you try the food or see the show together can be a super casual way to get a date.
7. "Would you want to do something just the two of us?"
If you're feeling daring, or you're just ready to make a move, ask your date to do something, only the two of you. Though you certainly don't need to propose a formal sit-down dinner date (though if that's your speed, you can find my email in my staff bio) suggesting taking a walk or grabbing a cup of coffee just the two of you can be a super chill way to get to know each other better.
8. "Hey, I'm sure you may have noticed, but I'm starting to have some *feelings* for you. If you're around this week, I'd love to talk to you in person about it."
If there has been undeniable sexual tension, ask to move the conversation off the phone. Talking in person can help you both understand how the other is feeling and can nip any potential texting miscommunications in the IRL bud.
9. "I think you are so *insert compliment* and I love talking to you."
Is your crush smart? Are they funny? Do they send the best Frasier GIFs? Sending a compliment that's not about their appearance and expressing how much you enjoy talking to them is a sweet way to show how you feel.
10. "Do you want to help me plan my birthday party?"
Consider asking your crush for help. Whether you need an extra set of hands to help install your IKEA shelving unit or you'd love to hear their ideas for a new art piece you're making, asking your crush for help shows them that you value their opinion and company, and that you want them in your life.
11. "You were so funny in your comedy show!"
Everyone loves a compliment. If your crush made a fantastic pasta salad for your barbecue or their intramural Wiffleball team won the game, expressing how well they did at something and how proud you are can make them feel special without putting them on the spot.
12. "Give them a call!"
If you really want to talk to your crush, try giving them a call. Calling someone can be a sweet and kind of retro way to have a conversation, and moreover, it can allow you to hear their voice and response in real-time (i.e., it will keep you from counting the minutes until they reply).
13. "I just want to say that I think you're great and I *like* you."
Sometimes honesty is the best policy. If you're starting to have serious feelings for a friend, it's OK to let them know. However, you may want to consider how they feel and their own comfort level. If you've never talked about romance, I probably wouldn't recommend, "My love for you burns with the white-hot intensity with of a thousand suns," à la Fairly Oddparents. A simple, "Hey, I like you!" can be really sweet.
If flirting with a crush can be nerve-racking, flirting with a crush who is also your friend can be straight-up intimidating. Though you never need to do anything that would make you uncomfortable, telling your crush how you feel may bring you closer together. And if you're trying to be a little more than friends, sending a flirty text can be a great first step.