Breakups don't have to be painful, but I think that more often that not, they are. Perhaps you'll stay friends, but again, I wouldn't hold your breath. In an ideal world, every split would be amicable and mutual. However, in the real world, the dissolution of a relationship is oftentimes not a cordial affair. There's no doubt that some breakups are harder than others, but if you think you already know the worst things to say after a breakup, I can guarantee that "let's stay friends" is nothing compared to what some exes have said.
My worst breakup ended up being the best thing that could have happened for me. For other people, their worst breakup still haunts them to this day (particularly because of their exes' parting words). Reddit users shared the most brutal thing that exes have said to them on this AskReddit thread about terrible breakups. I can't even believe that these exes are real, but unfortunately, they are. I've rounded up some of the most cringe-worthy stories from the thread (as well as from my own friends), and if these don't convince you to choose your words carefully before your next breakup, then I don't know what will.
The Ex Who Blamed Her For His Failures
After 10 years together and two weeks after the anniversary, [my ex told me], 'You inspire nothing but laziness in me and that's why I failed my latest military fitness test.'
Never mind the idiot was of course in another province across the country for the past year and a half at the time.
The Ex Who Insulted His Looks
I was dating this girl for a couple of months and one day out of nowhere she tells me she is getting married. Apparently she was in a sub/dom relationship of some sorts and she was told to date someone ugly to humiliate herself. I don't think I am ugly but that certainly took the wind out of my sails for a bit.
The Ex Who Couldn't "Handle Her Situation"
Me and my ex had been together for about eight months. I had been raped during our relationship. I told him that he should break up with me, but he kept telling me he wouldn't because he loved and cared about me. Well. The day after my birthday I was told by a friend of ours that my ex and his ex planned on breaking up with us and then getting together. When I asked [my ex] about it, he said he couldn't do it yesterday because it was my birthday, but he wanted to leave me because he couldn't handle my situation.
The Ex Who Claimed He Wasn't Man Enough
[After] two years with my ex, she leaves me for the 'don't worry we're just friends' guy, saying, 'You are so much more handsome, but he's just more macho.'
The Ex Who Called Him "Emotionless" — And Then Hurt His Feelings
She broke up [with me] via text by saying that I was 'emotionless,' and she ended up seeing my best friend not even a week later. I found that out via Facebook. That was a fun time.
The Ex With The Seriously Disturbing Fantasy
My first boyfriend and I had an on-again, off-again relationship for more than two years, and our breakups were always really emotional and awful. Six months after our last breakup, he invited me to dinner 'as friends' and tried to get me back. When it became clear that I wasn't interested in restarting our relationship, he got really upset. He told me that in the months we were apart, he had fantasized about raping me. It was the most incredibly toxic thing I've ever heard, and it just served as more proof to me that we would never get back together.
— Lisa*, 26
The Ex Who Imagined She Was Someone Else
He told me he didn't love me like he use to [and] said he imagined a different girl when we were intimate. We lived with his family and they went from ignoring me to insulting me. Then his mom said we need to take a break so I left. The only reason why I didn't leave sooner was because my family lived in a different state and I had nowhere to go in mind.
The Ex Who Said She Needed To "Fix Herself"
We'd been together on-and-off for about four months during our last semester of college. I'd been diagnosed with depression and OCD a few months before meeting him, and he was one of the first people I'd opened up to about my struggle with mental illness. We talked about staying together after college, but on the night before graduation, he said he couldn't stay with me any longer. 'I can't be with you until you fix yourself,' he said. It was for the best, and it definitely did give me time to 'fix' myself, but it still hurt so badly at the time.
— Rachel*, 27
The Ex Who Made This Extreme Proclamation
I informed him I was an atheist. He told me he couldn't be with my 'kind' and he called me the devil. It was probably for the best.
The Ex Who Told Him To "Be A Man"
She told me to delete the one remaining picture of us because she had a date with another guy (she did not even like him) and did not want people thinking she was cheating on me. When I asked her to talk, she told me 'be a man' or something like this. Pretty brutal at the time.
The Ex Who Decided That Her Mental Health Issues Were "Annoying"
My grandmother had passed away a week or two before it happened. My grandmother and I were very close and so I was devastated. I told him about it and he basically told me to get over it and to suck it up. A couple days letter, he had alluded to me that I had gained too much weight and that my mental health issues had become annoying (it turns out that most of the anxiety I was feeling was due to him being a complete and total assh*le). Then we were over. Told me that he couldn't see me as anything other than girlfriend and by that point, I blocked him on Facebook as well as my phone and haven't looked back since.
Breaking up with a significant other hurts, but nothing stings worse than a truly cruel post-breakup retort. If you've been hurt by an ex in the past, remember that you're not alone (and remember that your own words could hurt an ex just as much as their words can hurt you).
If you or someone you know has been sexually assaulted, call the National Sexual Assault Telephone Hotline at 800-656-HOPE (4673) or visit online.rainn.org.
If you or someone you know is seeking help for mental health concerns, visit the National Alliance on Mental Health (NAMI) website, or call 1-800-950-NAMI(6264). For confidential treatment referrals, visit the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) website, or call the National Helpline at 1-800-662-HELP(4357). In an emergency, contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK(8255) or call 911.
*Names have been changed