Trump's Sniffling May Be Caused By A Drug, But Not A Fun One


President Donald Trump knows you're nothing if you aren't beautiful.

I assume that's why he used to run Miss Universe, calls women fat pigs and reportedly takes Propecia to battle male pattern baldness.

We live in a shallow world.

Dr. Harold N. Bornstein, Trump's longtime personal physician, revealed the secret to his luscious locks -- so if you're looking to cop Number 45's look, then look no further than the prostate-related drug.

Bornstein, who boasts shoulder-length hair himself, told The New York Times Trump has all his own hair.

He is also the doctor who complimented Trump's health in December.

He wrote four paragraphs while Trump waited for him in his limousine. In part, it read,

If elected, Mr. Trump, I can state unequivocally, will be the healthiest individual ever elected to the presidency.

However, like with every drug, there are side effects. But beauty is pain.

Side effects include impotence, loss of interest in sex and trouble having an orgasm.

Based on comments Trump made about grabbing women by the pussy and how he may just start kissing a beautiful woman once he sees them, it looks like he's good.

Another side effect is swelling in the hands and feet, and as we've pointed out, Trump's hands remain as small as a newborns, so he is safe on that front, too!

But one side effect, that some viewers thought to be caused by another drug (cocaine), is a runny nose.

Scarily, the FDA-approved pill has other side effects, including chronic depression, insomnia, suicidal thoughts and brain fog.

Even if a man discontinues the use of finasteride (AKA Propecia), the symptoms may last. Doctors call the lasting symptoms "post-finasteride syndrome."

Finasteride has been around since the 1970s. Scientists discovered a group of men in the Dominican Republic who were born with ambiguous genitalia.

Often, these men were mistakenly raised as girls, who then "grew" male genitalia once they reached puberty.

On top of this, these men never lost their hair or developed prostate problems because they never produced an enzyme that turns testosterone into dihydrotestosterone (DHT).

DHT is needed for a fetus to develop male genitals, but it also causes men to stop growing hair when they are adults.

Merck, the pharmaceutical company that produces Propecia, were inspired by these men and made the drug, which cuts DHT levels by 70 percent.

According to Men's Journal, the drug works by "mimicking the sex-steroid profile of pseudohermaphrodites."

Male users who have quit taken the drug refer to it as "chemical castration," leading the publication to question if the leader of the free world should be on such medicine.

Citations: Trump Takes Propecia, A Hair-Loss Drug Associated With Mental Confusion, Impotence (Huffington Post)