I used to be a birthdayzilla with balloons, cakes and the whole shebang. I loved planning birthdays and surprises for friends, but when it came to me, the favor was never returned. That's when I realized that planning my own birthday was too much pressure trying to please others.
After spending my birthday alone, studying for exams, in another country for the last three years, I realized birthdays don't mean much after 25.
The '90s babies are not babies anymore. They're considered “old AF” compared to the new generation. Obviously, this is inevitable. But it still makes you feel inadequate and terrible.
You can't keep up with the new lingo of the uprising generation, which makes you feel like you don't fit in, like you're stuck in the middle between the old and new. Here are just a few reasons why I stopped celebrating my birthday.
1. Nobody Cares.
After you hit 25, you're deemed almost an adult, you're not hip and cool anymore.
Let's be real: Your 21st birthday went on for a week, or a month. But after 21, the birthday celebrations started dying down. Does this make you less important? No.
Birthday celebrations do not define you, your status or your significance in this world. You are important with or without a huge party or a small celebration.
It just makes you realize you're ancient and this whole aging thing needs to stop.
Even though age is just a number, someone, make it stop!
2. Everyone is already in debt.
They'd rather sit home and watch Netflix than have to come home from work, get dressed and go to your lame party. I mean, the gifts are going to be purchased last minute anyway, as they're running to the convenience store because they forgot to get you a birthday card. Heck, they might even forget to sign the card because they're in a rush.
Your birthday just became another errand on their daily to-do list.
Birthday celebrations and dinners are costly. They put pressure on the recipient to add more debt to their credit card, on a dinner or trip they can't afford, to please you, or make you happy. It's simply unnecessary.
3. Celebrating a birthday must be an LA or NY thing because people in the Midwest haven't heard this concept.
I mean, some people really don't like their birthdays and don't like the attention. They think it's the worst thing that could happen to them, because they absolutely hate that all attention is on them.
Birthday celebrations are not for everyone.
4. If you invite a lot of people it could mean you have false friendships and you're just there for the gifts.
Having loads of people at your celebrations is not necessarily a good thing. It doesn't mean you have good friends and confidants in all of those people.
As you age, you realize that those numbers die down. You have fewer attendees each year, which isn't necessarily a bad thing, because they are your closest friends.
5. If you invite barely any people, it means you have real friends, but you're not as popular anymore.
There's so much pressure to plan something and to invite the people you care about. Once you start planning you think "If I don't invite Jessica, she'll be upset," or "If I invite Caitlyn, I have to invite Olivia."
This gets complicated because you don't want to offend anyone, but you also only want only your closest friends there. And so, your birthday turns into a list of who was really there for me and do I still talk to them?
If you've got a lot on your plate like a full-time job, your studies and exams, and you just don't have time, it's OK. You don't have to celebrate like you used to.
It means you are growing up and your priorities and values have changed. You don't need to celebrate every single year in a glorious way, you can celebrate milestones. Welcome to adulthood!