This season of Bachelor in Paradise is a freaking hot mess. Not even the good kind of reality TV drama, just a total crash and burn. This was once again proven by the arrival of Haley and Emily Ferguson, the professional twins. They thought they would blow into Mexico, steal some hot men, and head home without breaking a sweat. Unfortunately, they were in for a very unpleasant surprise. Why did the twins leave Paradise? Honestly, kind of bad luck.
First of all, don't be surprised that everyone is taken when you roll into Paradise on the last week. That was their first problem. Second, they picked two of the most unobtainable men. Haley came in very interested in Derek, but he is basically engaged to Taylor. Emily had her heart set on Dean. That was literally the only reason she came to Paradise. I seriously thought Dean was going to go for it, that's just the kind of f*ckboy he is. However, Kristina had just gone home the night prior, and he had his hands full with Danielle. HONESTLY, LIKE THAT'S EVER GOING TO BE A THING. Since both men were unavailable for the date (trust me, Emily gave it her all), the twins ended up asking Jack Stone and Tickle Monster. Womp, womp.
They were bummed, but it was a double date so at least they were able to go together. That is, until Jack Stone decided literally one minute before the date that he didn't want to go. He decided he liked Christen too much. Kind of sh*tty he waited until the last minute, but the twins took it to a whole new level of drama.
To give you an idea of how bad things got, Emily took to Twitter on Sept. 3 (two days before the episode aired) to publicly apologize for how they acted.
Their fans actually understood and accepted the apology.
When Jack Stone canceled on their date, the twins decided they had enough of Paradise. They started by telling Jack Stone off, called him a serial killer, and literally made him cry. Then, they made a very loud exit with their middle fingers in the air while yelling, “f*ck you, Paradise.” Finally, they cursed Jack Stone and Christen (aka scallop fingers) by throwing raw scallops on the ground and yelling, “F*ck you, Jack Stone. F*ck you, scallop fingers.” Twitter was not about it and came to Jack Stone's aid.
Don't worry, Jack Stone fans -- he definitely had the last laugh. He roasted the twins during an interview when he said, “The twins will go home, watch Frozen, play with their fidget spinners. They'll be fine.” DAYUMMM.
With the twins gone and that sh*tstorm over with, I'm definitely ready for finale week. I'm exhausted.