With such a wonderful, rich history of political corruption, American bureaucratic BS never ceases to amaze me. But witnessing my beloved country welcome Donald Trump as a reasonable GOP presidential candidate is so remarkably disappointing, I've considered jetting to another country.
Prior to adding "president" to his bucket list, Trump's anti-Obama antics and offensive "The Apprentice" banter should have solidified his spot amongst the stupid, super-rich celebs who are not at all built for political careers.
However, since announcing his White House goals in June, the 69-year-old billionaire's reckless rhetoric about women and people of color has been strewn across more headlines than Kim Kardashian's bare baby bump.
As of today, Trump's support surges upward as Hillary Clinton's is slightly downgraded. Unfortunately, I can no longer think America's being punk'd. After all, we really do love watching train wrecks who rant. (See: Kanye West).
To put it plainly, Trump would be a trash POTUS compared to his competition, no matter how outrageously entertaining the media believes him to be.
Sure, Trump's a money guy capable of lifting the US economy, which Millennials desperately want to see happen. Still, his candid opinions have led me to believe his political reign would do more damage to our country's overall social progress.
I don't know about you, but I'd rather not stick around and watch us zip-line backward in time.
So if there's a chance Trump talks his way into the doors of 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, here are some reasons why that would be my cue to flee the country.
He constantly insults women.
For the most part, women are having a pretty great year. Yet, whenever a mic's at the ready, Trump hurls his disgraceful slights at the fairer sex.
Megyn Kelly and Heidi Klum recently bore the brunt of the business magnate's ill words. Actually, they're on the shortlist of an extensive archive of women Trump has disrespected, sexualized and belittled over the years.
"You have called women you don’t like 'fat pigs,' 'dogs,' 'slobs,' and 'disgusting animals,'" Kelly reminded him during the GOP debate. He later responded by calling her a "bimbo."
What a great guy, right? He even admitted he would date his daughter, Ivanka Trump, if she wasn't kin.
And you want this disgusting misogynist to rep women's rights?
He lacks the capacity to see women as more than hot objects and trophy wives, openly admitting that Kelly wouldn't have gotten her job had she not been beautiful. He's gone as far as to Kanye shrug at sexual assaults in the military.
If you ask me, he's public enemy number one to our fight to equalize gender roles and close the gender pay gap.
He demonstrates a racist attitude toward immigrants.
Trump's attitude toward immigrants, specifically Hispanics, has been more despicable than Leonardo DiCaprio's dad bod.
Trump falsely accused Mexico of "not sending the best" citizens across US borders, citing increased crime rates and drug problems.
In the midst of his delusional claims, he dodged facts reported by Univision anchor Jorge Ramos and suggested Jeb Bush should "set the example by speaking English while in the United States." Why? Because Trump doesn't "have the time for total political correctness."
If you can barely forgive Kelly Osbourne for her slip of the tongue, there's no way you should want a commander in chief who plans to build a wall along the Mexican border.
He's just downright hateful.
Trump has built a viral campaign on outrageous claims and hate speech. For example, he mastered ignorance when he deemed Democratic presidential candidate Martin O'Malley "weak" and "pathetic" for apologizing to Black Lives Matter protesters.
With race issues climbing, why make detrimental allegations that further divide the nation?
He lacks the good-hearted nature previous presidents have embodied, making it pretty clear what his leadership would be built on: divisiveness, prejudice and ignorance. Not at all qualities of a president I'd trust or whose administration I'd feel safe living under.
I can only hope the rest of the country sees beyond his deep pockets and won't be wooed by his ballsy inclinations. But if we somehow enter a twilight zone where Trump's behavior is so ridiculously entertaining people are slurping up his Kool-Aid by the truckload, it could mean he would win the next presidential seat.
I, for one, will be on the next thing smokin'.