The Trick To Getting What You Want Is Finding Out What It Is You Want

I think our main issue as women in getting what we want is figuring out what we want. For some reason, our gender had to be the one that is indecisive as f*ck.  I can’t even go to a salad place that has too many options because I never know what to choose. I wind up adding a little bit of everything and then being unsatisfied with the result.

The first step in getting what you want is knowing what you want. This goes for love, sex, friendship, your career and health. Here is some advice for knowing what you want and getting what you want in each of these categories:


Women make their love lives way more complicated than they have to be. I always had this theory that there is one significant difference between men and women when it comes to relationships. While men never want to “settle down,” it’s only because they know what they do and don’t want. When they find a girl that is right for them, they are sure of it and are ready to commit.

Women are always rushed to get into a relationship because they like the idea of one. We often neglect whether we truly can see ourselves with this person or not. We don’t really know what we want and that’s why we make things so complicated. Know what you want and until you find it, don’t settle. Instead, just enjoy being the independent bitch that you are.


I couldn’t bring myself to put love and sex in the same category. Love involves relationships and all that mushy affectionate sh*t. Sex strictly involves getting what you want in the bedroom (or wherever you do it.) Many women don’t know what they want in the bedroom because they forget to consider it.

The problem is that half the time men don’t know what the f*ck they’re doing and women don’t know how to speak up. If you want something, say it. Guys tell us what to do. Trust me, confidence is a turn-on. Men are also under the impression that women are always enjoying sex more than we really are because we know how to fake it. Figure out what you want and then be assertive.


Strangely, women are indecisive when it comes to friends, as well. One day this chick is our best friend and the next day she’s a heinous b*tch. It may stem from our grammar school days when we loved switching up friend groups and making stupid ass names for them: like Fabulous Five, Fierce Four, or Nobody Gives a F*ck Nine.

In this area of life, we can take a lesson from men. Their friendships are consistent because they don’t let drama and bullsh*t get in the way. We must take a step back from the insignificant details that we allow to get in the way of our friendships and look at the big picture: Who will always have your back? Who motivates you and makes you laugh? Who do you have fun with? Those girls are worth keeping around for life.

Your Career

So many women I know have pursued a career because it was “safe” or it was what they thought they “should be doing.” Let’s get something straight now: in life, there are no right or wrong answers. It’s all up to your interpretation and priorities.

So figure out who you are and what you want now. After that, make sure you have the tools to make it happen. If you don’t, work on getting those tools. Don’t take the easy way out. You’ll be way happier knowing you challenged yourself to do what you love rather than let yourself stay in your comfort zone.


When it comes to health, we are the extremely inconsistent with exercise and diet. This is because we don’t know what we want. One day, we’re all like f*ck it, I want to enjoy my life and eat whatever I want. But the next day, we’re freaking out that we look like beached whales and food is our arch nemesis.

The goal shouldn’t be never to eat a carb again. The goal should be to feel healthy and create balance. The key to feeling and looking how you want is making health a lifestyle, not a crash diet. Eating healthy doesn’t have to be a diet and working out doesn’t have to suck.

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