I'm a sexually active woman who's into sexy-time tech (hello, Drake-fueled vibrator).
So, naturally, I'm always down to try something that promises to take my orgasm from 0 to 100 and my Tinder right-swipe from “one night only” to “OK, maybe I'll actually spend the night."
When my friend started talking about 3nder, Tinder for threesomes, I knew I needed to get some two-for-one action of my own. I figured it might actually be time to put my love life on hold and get in touch with the side of me that doesn't want to see your face between the hours of 5 am and 10 pm.
While I didn't score a threesome via the app, I did feel kind of relieved. OkCupid and Tinder, the two main dating platforms I use, are littered with couples looking for a third. As an app devoted exclusively to open couples on the hunt for unicorns, it felt more transparent. Let's take the bullsh*t out of threesomes, everyone!
3nder isn't the first app I've f*cked around with. Luckily for me and my sex life, there are plenty of apps that promise to deliver not only a hot date for tonight, but also multiple orgasms.
Pillow is essentially a choose-your-adventure game, if those were rated R and involved sensory deprivation.
The app prompts couples to listen and follow along to audio play-by-play with kissing, touching and whatever else it is that couples do. Basically, it's like a naughty audiobook, except you won't feel awkward listening to this one while in bed next to your partner.
Better yet, the app is totally female-positive and compatible with queer as well as straight couples. Get touching, y'all.
If you've ever felt weird about talking to a partner about your dirtiest fantasies, raise your hand. If that's not all of you, you're lying sh*ts.
UnderCovers takes away the anxiety of talking about all the kinky sh*t you want to do to each another (tie each other up, have sex in the outdoors, what have you) by allowing you to swipe on what works and doesn't for you and your partner.
You swipe left, right and the middle "open for discussion" for each kink, role play scenario or idea. When you match with your partner, the app will let you know.
Kindu is like Tinder, but for the adventurous crowd.
It's pretty simple: You swipe right on the stuff you want to do and swipe left on the stuff you don't. Unlike UnderCovers, it doesn't rely on a set number of fantasies -- it allows you and your partner to submit your own. It also gives you the opportunity to prioritize fantasies and hide the ones you don't want your partner seeing.
If you get a kink match with your partner, you're told what it is. If not, it disappears into thin air. All you have to do is invite someone.
4. OhMiBod blueMotion
Long-distance relationships no longer just have to rely on Skype sex and frisky FaceTime moments to get the blood pumping.
The blueMotion app syncs with a personal massager (JK, a vibrator), letting you and your partner control the kind of vibrations you're getting. You can even record audio on it, in case listening to your partner's voicemail over and over again just isn't doing it for you.
Ah, good 'ol 3nder. The app helps you score a third for your party, which makes things way easier than trolling Tinder for someone that's down with an extra body (or two, or three, if you're into it).
What I personally love about this app is that it's surprisingly way less creepy than Tinder, OkCupid or even Bumble. It's a level playing field, as everyone here is either with someone or looking for someone that is.
There's nothing more frustrating than swiping right on someone that's already in a relationship, and 3nder alleviates that by matching you with like-minded people. It's a win-win.