Lifestyle

15 Bowls More Important To You Than The Super Bowl

by Adam Silvers

As hard as it might be for me to comprehend, I understand not everyone is as pumped about this Sunday's Super Bowl as I am.

You're tired of having your feeds jammed up with Super Bowl-related content, have no interest in drinking and eating yourself into oblivion on Sunday and couldn't care less about Cam Newton and Peyton Manning.

OK, OK.

Well, this piece has nothing to do with the Super Bowl other than it being mentioned in the title, I promise.

But, just because you're not a fan of the greatest American sporting event of the year doesn't mean you're not a fan of other important bowls.

Huh, you ask?

How about that mixing bowl you use to make brownies when life just kicked the crap out of you? Or, how about the bowl you use nightly to get high?

Yah, I bet those bowls are way more crucial to your life than a football game.

From the ones used for making baked goods to the kind used for smoking green goods, here are 15 bowls way more important to you than the Super Bowl.

Your ramen bowl

Is there anything you look forward to more in the winter than a hot bowl of ramen? I think not.

Your burrito bowl

Ain't nobody trying to hear one football game is better than one of the greatest inventions in modern history.

Your toilet bowl

I think this one is self-explanatory.

Your yogurt bowl

If you're still using a cone as your primary vehicle for yogurt ingestion, I don't f*ck with you.

Your mixing bowl

When life gives you the finger, the only appropriate response is to make gooey, delicious brownies.

Your salad bowl

Where would you be without the ability to try to make kale tasty? You'd be eating kale out of a bag like a deranged Richard Simmons, that's where.

Your pot bowl

I think this one also falls into the self-explanatory category.

Your fruit bowl

Whether you enjoy eating the occasional banana or just want to be ready to host an impromptu still-life painting class, you need a solid fruit bowl.

Your key bowl

Seriously, it's like the one item that doesn't get lost in my apartment, which means I never have to spend 15 minutes looking for my keys.

Brooklyn Bowl

I went on a date here once. It didn't work out, but I got to drink great whiskey, eat macaroni and cheese, bowl and listen to The Roots, all in one room.

Your dog's food and water bowls

If your pet is hungry, you might as well be hungry, amirite?

Your bread bowl

Tell me your broccoli cheddar soup tastes the same out of a regular ceramic bowl. Go ahead, I'll wait.

Your cereal bowl

Your significant other might tell you Saturday morning cartoons and cereal are for kids, but I beg to differ. Couch + cereal bowl + television = happiness.

The Dust Bowl

Guys, The Dust Bowl was no laughing matter and if we don't learn from history, we're doomed to repeat it. More important than the Super Bowl? It just might be.

That bowl that dispenses your change at the self-checkout

Without this bowl, our change would literally be all over the place at the grocery store. I mean, imagine trying to track down all this change while swinging bags of milk, bread, avocados and whatever else you bought. Disaster.