The student has become the master.
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, Snapchat (an app that was designed so that teenagers could safely send each other pictures of their genitalia) is now more popular than Instagram (an app designed so that teenagers could safely bully each other with like-embargos) in a crucial way.
According to App Annie, a company that specializes in this sort of thing, users officially spend more time on Snapchat than they do on Instagram.
This comes as no surprise to me, as I have seen a steady drying up of my post-to-like ratio over the past year. Where once upon a time, a selfie of me in front of a poster of Katniss Everdeen with the caption “My girlfriend is so driven!” used to provide me with a bountiful and robust self-esteem-sustaining-like crop, now I have to literally post a picture of myself during a wisdom tooth extraction to get anything like my old numbers.
Snapchat is now second only to Facebook among iPhone users. Facebook, incidentally, owns Instagram — so it's really feeling the heat. Plus, in 2013, Facebook even tried to buy Snapchat for $3 billion dollars, but Snapchat refused. At the time, I thought those dick-pic peddlers were out of their minds not taking that deal. But apparently they know business — and dicks — better than I.