Joseph Alvarado

World's Worst Robbers Leave Family Note Explaining Exactly What They Stole

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Joseph Alvarado's house in Houston, Texas was broken into and robbed by what appears to be a couple of children while he was away.

Alvarado's daughter was the first to notice the door was open. They'd come in by kicking in the back door -- which, to me, seems hard for a kid to do, but we'll get to my forensic deductions later.

They then found the notes, which were full of misspellings and written in a childish scrawl.

Joseph Alvarado

One note said,

I stole your stuffe because my borther told me to

The next note starts off with "[we] broke in" but the "we" is crossed out and replaced with "I." Yes, this level of criminal sophistication strikes fear into the heart of man.

Joseph Alvarado

The note continued,

I broke in HAHA and took your ps3 controlers, games, and computer. by, a kid haha

A PS3? They might as well have stolen a polaroid camera. Or a flip phone. Or a dial-up modem. Or a -- OK, I think that's enough examples of old stuff.

OK, so my theory: What if this was just a weird and clever trick by a thief to make the cops suspect a couple of kids of the crime? God, I hope that's what happened. It would be such a bold strategy.

But it's probably just a couple kids being dumb.

Citations: New York Post