Aerial Vid Of LA Thanksgiving Traffic Will Make You Smug You're Already Home

This is not just a traffic jam. This is hell on Earth and I bet you can't wipe that smug grin off your face as you watch the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade from your comfy couch.

Unlucky if you were one of the thousands of people caught up in this nightmarish scene.

A stream of white and red lit up Los Angeles' 405 Freeway on Tuesday night as everyone rushed home for the holiday.

Looks like everyone had the same idea to beat the traffic, except no one beat the traffic.

The standstill -- captured from above by helicopter -- shows the gridlock stretching for miles.

People described it as the best mannequin challenge yet. Others joked it's called the 405 freeway because it takes you "4 o 5" hours to get anywhere.

Someone with a more sciencey mind likened the traffic to red and white blood cells flowing in and out of a main artery.

Hellish scenes.

LOOK AT IT.

No doubt some people driving home will have actually chosen this traffic situation over being with their family.

Awkward small talk with distant relatives aside, this year's Thanksgiving dinner table is going to be more politically charged than ever.

I hear some families even have a "no politics" rule to avoid turkey legs being thrown across the room.

Thankfully, you've come to the right place. We've put together the ultimate survival guide to how to conquer this holiday.

Basically, follow these simple rules and you're golden:

1. Laugh your way out of everything.

2. Kill them with kindness.

3. If all else fails, create a diversion.

Watch this video for guidance -- let it be your bible this weekend.

Good luck and stay safe out there people.

Fun bonus facts:

Around 49 million people are expected to travel an average of 50 miles for Thanksgiving.

An estimated 46 million turkeys will be gobbled down in America today.