What Saturn Returns Means For Your Love Life Moving Forward

On Dec. 21, 2017, after spending the last two and a half years in Sagittarius, Saturn moves into Capricorn. For those of us — including myself — who have Capricorn in the seventh house of their birth chart until March 21, 2020, we will be learning how our fears and insecurities inform the ways we approach relationships. People who have Saturn in their Seventh House cycle through being completely wrapped up in relationships to breaking from the relationship to be completely solo, to being terrified to enter a relationship again. And then the pattern repeats.

If you do not find a way to break from this pattern, you can experience difficulty and sorrow in your relationships. Saturn appears to be the universal god force, the external, paternalistic hand that is larger than any one person on the planet. But when Saturn falls in your Seventh House, its effects are actually those of your own inner needs being projected outward. You are the only one who creates your patterns of attraction and rejection. That means you have the power to change them.

Everyone over these next two and a half years is going to feel the effects of Saturn in Capricorn, which means that regardless of your birth chart, this time will present you with a particularly unique opportunity to break from harmful structures and patterns that rule your relationships. Your Saturn Return is basically a required course that you need to take once every 30 years. If you don't learn these lessons now, then you'll need to repeat them in another decade of your life.

Better take some notes.

1. You Will Be Challenged With Questions Of Worth

Saturn is moving into Capricorn, the constellation that governs material worth and issues around abundance. If Capricorn falls in your Seventh House, then much of your previous relationships have been about resolving how you perceived your own worth. You might have had to settle for less in relationships in order to learn your true value.

As Saturn returns to Capricorn, it sets in motion new layers to these lessons. You might find that previous issues regarding emotional worth have now turned into material obstacles. Time and distance might pose barriers to your relationship, and you might not have the finances to overcome them. Learning how to build new relationship structures will teach you how to withstand financial pressure. How can you remain emotionally close, even with miles and miles in between? How can you keep yourself fed, even when you're living from paycheck to paycheck?

Once you find a way around these barriers, you'll find that unions of the body are nothing compared to unions of the soul.

2. You Will Learn What It Means To Go The Distance

When Saturn is in Capricorn, you have the tendency to clamp down on relationships when you should let go. The issues surrounding your self-worth might cause you to keep working and working at love, even when it causes you to overextend yourself. Saturn is going to throw up lots of obstacles to your love this year that will cause you to overhaul how you approach relationships.

Choose to see obstacles as challenges rather than prison walls that are holding you in. Throwing all of your resources at a problem will just create new problems when your resources are gone. Be focused less on the now and more on the future you want for yourself.

If you're in a long-distance relationship, for example, this is a good time to consider whether it makes financial sense to keep spending money on plane tickets or if a move is in your future. Stay grounded in what you really want so you don't lose your head focusing on what gets in the way.

3. You Will Need To Stop Focusing On Childhood Wounds

Saturn is the daddy force of the cosmos. In psychoanalysis, fathers are often perceived as the root of problems in relationships and family structures. Instead of continuing to dwell on your daddy issues, consider them the source of difficult lessons you had to learn to grow.

Saturn in Capricorn will teach you that your parents aren't actually the source of all of your dysfunctions. At some point, you have to take responsibility for your actions. You are their sole owner, so start actually owning them.

The lessons you experience in your partnerships during this time will teach you that you need to stop looking to your partnerships to fulfill mommy and daddy issues. Staying in a perpetual state of childhood won't allow you to heal your wounds. Learning how you can be a better parent to yourself will.

Instead of dwelling on the ways your parents hurt you, realize that they only ever caused you harm out of their own sense of woundedness. To truly heal, you need to find a way to forgive your parents. If you don't, you will keep looking to your relationships to heal your mommy and daddy issues. That basically causes you to act out your old wounds within new relationships. Saturn reminds you that nothing in this universe exists without a history. That doesn't mean you can't make a clean break to find a fresh start.

4. You Will Finally Be Responsible For Your Own Growth

Your parents are not your fate. Your destiny is your own to make. Saturn in Capricorn manifests these lessons in your resources. Your house, money, and the things you own are yours to use and share as you like. You don't have to spend extraneous energy on relationships that do not serve you or drain you of your precious energy. And even the baggage you carry from childhood contains important lessons. Use them.

You'll also realize that the effect you have on others is just as much a part of your relationship dynamics as the effect they have on you. Saturn doesn't allow you to sit around and feel sorry for yourself. You'll learn that wallowing keeps you stuck in the past. Allow yourself to be pushed upward and onward to find new growth.

5. You Will Learn The Limitations Of Blame

Saturn teaches you that what you project in the world makes up your reality. If you continue to project all of your parents' mistakes on your relationships, then you will repeat them. Saturn teaches you that very few people in life set out to hurt your feelings. The damage they cause is the product of the wounds they haven't healed within themselves.

That doesn't mean that you are responsible for healing your parents. That means that you need to learn when and how you should protect yourself from their influences so you don't make their same mistakes. When you are able to claim responsibility for the people you choose to align with, it's much easier to stay within a healthy union with yourself. Ultimately, this is the key to finding sustainability within relationships.

At the other end of Saturn's transit through Capricorn we will have learned how the lessons of the past can improve the present. The growth, however you choose to approach it, will happen. It gets easier if you spend as much time looking outward as you do gazing within.

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