If I had a dollar for every time I've heard "Our first date was drinks," I'd be a millionaire. And while there's nothing wrong with a casual drinks- after-work date the first or second time you meet, at some point, you might start thinking about turning your week-day dates into weekend plans. Ultimately, you may want to spend more time with this person when you're refreshed and relaxed, not stressed out after a long day of answering emails and sitting at your desk. Fortunately, making the transition is easier than you might think.
"In many cases, this transition is something that will happen naturally the more you get to know each other," intuitive dating coach and author of The Dating Mirror: Trust Again, Love Again, Diana Dorell tells Elite Daily. "In essence, we want to naturally spend more time with people we care about and like. So, if there is a strong connection, you may find that you want to extend the date... or end up spending more time at one person's neck of the woods than the other."
If you've been on a couple of dates and you're anxious to get on their weekend schedule, but they keep suggesting dinner after work or school, here are a few expert-approved suggestions for ways to bring it up.
First of all, try not to get too worked up about turning your week-day dates into longer adventures together. "If it's clear that both of you enjoy spending time together and want to take it past the dinner date, approaching the conversation lightly and playfully can help," Dorell says. For example, Dorell recommends suggesting hang-outs two days in a row, but keep it as casual as possible by saying something like, "How would you feel about us checking out the farmers' market tomorrow too?"
"Stay as open and detached from the outcome as possible," Dorell says. "Leave room for the other person to share any reservations or hesitations."
At the very worst, they might just not be ready to spend more time together yet, and that's OK! "Even though they may like you, spending that next level of time together may not be something they are ready for just yet," Dorell says. "But by having the conversation and expressing that you are open, you will quell any feelings of resentment because you've spoken your truth."
If you're ready to ask them to spend more time together, but aren't sure what to suggest, life coach Nina Rubin has some ideas. Things like "theme parks, sporting events, summertime concerts in the park, [and] arts and music festivals in your local city are all great ways to up the time you spend together," she tells Elite Daily.
If you and this person are really hitting it off, then it's only natural to want to spend more time together, so don't be shy about bringing it up! The worst that can happen is they say no, and even then, at least you know where you stand.