When it comes to cheesy couples' pics on Valentine's Day, I am firmly and forever on Team Eye Roll. I’m not talking about the couple that shares the occasional pic of the the two of them doing something special, like taking a vacation or rescuing a new pet (honestly, I'm mostly just excited about the cute puppy or kitten in this equation). What I am talking about is that couple, the one we know (and if we're really unlucky, couples... plural) who clog up our social media feeds day after day with a seemingly endless dream of the two of them performing romance. Barf. And the hashtags, don’t even get me started. Let’s just say that nothing is less #couplesgoals than folks who can't stop rubbing their #truelove in our #faces. It’s really just obnoxious and, even worse, boring. I mean, cool, you split an everything bagel, but does the world really need to know that?
No. The answer is: No.
When Valentine's Day rolls around, this habit of cutesy couple oversharing epidemic metastasizes. If you thought they were cheesy in January, just brace yourself for the tsunami of couples' photos coming your way in mid-February. My teeth are already chattering at the thought of what my Facebook feed is about to turn into. But why does it bother me so much? We live in a world in turmoil, with global warming threatening to drown the planet, the government ever on the verge of a shutdown, and Vanderpump Rules has not yet been confirmed for a Season 7 (and it better get one because this season is fire). So, why expend so much emotional energy on something so trite? Well, maybe that's exactly the point. We are facing real problems, and the naval gazing self-aggrandizement of these over-the-top couple photos doesn't say "love" or "human connection" to me, it says "look at me, look what I have, now compare yourself to me. Aren't you just so jealous?"
It's the literal antithesis of the world needs right now.
Or maybe it’s something else. Am I just getting more and more bitter? I probably sound bitter AF, but I’m actually not. The fact is, I have been cuffed up for a literal decade and about happy and secure in the relationship as you could be. I even am a bit of a romantic in my own way, which definitely strays away from "traditional romance." I just have a very low tolerance for cheesiness, which is also a major factor for why Valentine's Day couples' photos get under my skin.
I think what really truly bothers me about these photos is how obviously performative they are (or at least, they feel). And thirsty, so very thirsty — what they really need is to be #blessed #withaglassofwater. While the over-the-top displays of coupledom have always rang false to me, it turns out I am on to something. A study of couples who overshare on Facebook have found they are actually masking insecurity, according to a September 2014 study by the Society for Personality and Social Psychology on attachment and relationship visibility. Couples who are less secure are more compelled to make their relationships as “visible” as possible by posting about them daily, the study noted. Is there anything more satisfying than having your personal distastes and hot takes validated by science? So. Good.
Here's the thing, if you really love posting a billionty photos of you and bae and that truly makes you happy, what I think ultimately doesn't matter. Will I continue to judge you silently from my quiet corner of the internet? Yes, but who cares. You do you, boo.
That being said, maybe just this once, just for this Valentine’s Day, consider instead of posting a corny AF photo of the two of you in a frame of balloon hearts, while laying on a bed of roses, and feeding each other chocolates, try being in the actual moment and, in doing, so getting all the validation you need from your partner — and not your audience on social media. Just a thought.
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