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Nikki Bella's Reaction To John Cena Wanting Kids Is So Real – EXCLUSIVE

John Cena wants to get back together with Nikki Bella and have kids, which is... confusing. He made it clear over the course of his six-year relationship with Bella that he didn't want kids at all. He didn't even want to get married for a while. But the couple did get engaged and were about to tie the knot when Bella called it off because she wants to be a mom. Now, Cena has backtracked and said he wants to be the father of Bella's children, and Nikki Bella's reaction to John Cena wanting kids will make you feel for her. In an exclusive interview with Elite Daily, Nikki Bella talks about her breakup with John Cena and how learning that her ex-fiancé finally wants to have kids has produced "a numb feeling."

Total Bellas Season 3 premieres on Sunday, May 20, and fans of the show are in for an emotional rollercoaster this season. The upcoming season is going to document Bella and Cena's entire breakup, and right from episode one, you can feel the tension between Nikki Bella and John Cena, as well as Brie Bella and Nikki Bella. Throughout the first two episodes, Brie Bella tries to get Nikki to see how restricting her relationship with Cena had become.

Sometimes you don't realize how much you can lose yourself until you start finding yourself and soul-searching.

Speaking with the sisters in person, they say they're nervous for this season to air, but Nikki Bella says she's ready for viewers to see the truth about her breakup. "They're going to be hard to relive," Bella tells Elite Daily, "but I think because of the media frenzy around it all, I'm kind of excited for the world to see it because there's a lot of whys, and I feel like people are kind of coming up with their own little stories. But I'm excited for people to see the journey that got us where we're at today. It's a bittersweet type of thing."

In a clip from the season premiere, Brie Bella tries to get Nikki to realize the level of sacrifices she had been making for Cena and how Cena's sacrifices for her didn't match up.

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The tension about Bella and Cena's relationship is high throughout the first two episodes. It's clear just how badly Bella wants kids and how much of a struggle it is for her to let that dream go for the sake of keeping Cena around. Imagine the shock Bella must have felt when after everything she had been through after calling off their wedding, Cena turned around and said he actually does want to have kids. Bella tells Elite Daily that "it still hasn't sunken in."

During an interview with Hoda Kotb and Kathie Lee Gifford on Today on May 14, Cena said, "I love her. I want to be with her. I want to make her my wife. I want to be the father of her children. I just want us to work." Bella responded to Cena's comments about reconciliation in an interview with Extra. She hadn't seen the video yet, so when she was told what Cena said, Bella responded, "Wow, I'm speechless."

She tells Elite Daily that Cena is still her "best friend" and she has hope they'll get back together in the future, but right now she still needs time to go home and digest this new information. "It still hasn't sunken in," Bella tells Elite Daily. "I think it's because I've still been in New York, so it's more of a numb feeling."

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She continues,

I think I'm going to need to go home and be in my surroundings to fully digest everything, but I think John is such an incredible man. He's amazing. He's my best friend. And I truly have hope for us in the future, but I know only time will tell.

Bella tells Elite Daily that she's working on finding herself and kind of hitting the refresh button on her life in the midst of this breakup. She makes it clear that before she will consider getting back together with Cena (which she genuinely hopes will happen), she's going to work on herself and evolve and grow. And according to her, that's done with "a lot of therapy, and a lot of date nights" with herself and her sister. "Sometimes you don't realize how much you can lose yourself until you start finding yourself and soul-searching," she says.

She adds that she's working on actively practicing self-love and self-care, so she will be able to not only know herself better, but also to be able to demand what she wants out of life. And that applies to reconciling with Cena. Bella tells Elite Daily, "I think I'm just at an age where I'm 34, and with the women's movement and how strong women have become, it's inspired me."

She continues,

I feel like there's just so much strength in this world that it's given me strength and has really made me stand up for what I want for the rest of my life and what will make me happy. I don't want to live with regret. I just want to live a very happy life.

Total Bellas Season 3 premieres Sunday, May 20, at 9 p.m. on E!.